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Thread: I am lost.

  1. #121
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    Im so sorry Marijo. I understand what you are saying about the FEAR you are feeling. It was a stupid thing to say. Foot in mouth! Sometimes you think you are helping and then you say something dumb. BRAIN FOG! I just want to HELP YOU so BAD and i cant. It HURTS ME to see you hurting and i want to take your pain away. I LOVE YOU
    We Live in a MORTAL, FRAIL, IMPERFECT world in which the word "FAIR" doesn't always apply.Make EVERY MOMENT COUNT with the ones you LOVE because it can end in the blink of an eye. Love, Jeannette

  2. #122
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    Jeanette, hugs..no it wasn't stupid. It was caring and loving. I never thought it be any other way. I love you too....hugs.
    I have Lupus. So *^#@! what.

  3. #123
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    Sending big hugs n love.

    Amanda,xxxxx
    I am still here,just been on new meds so unable to function like i used to.I will pop back,just know im thinking of you all and hoping you are keeping on keeping on.xxxxxxx

  4. #124
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    Oluwa,
    I think that you would be a perfect candidate for a service dog. They can be trained to help with motility, as mine does, or to help with psychological needs. I met a lady the other day who has a note from her doctor that allows her to carry her little service dog everywhere with her because it helps to prevent panic attacks.
    You might like my dog's story:
    My daughter bought Conner, a pure-bred German Shepherd, in early 2007 and trained him to be her "demo-dog" when she was training other dogs. She married an Airman and they were stationed in Arkansas in 2009. Conner was allergic to something there, and his eczema was so bad, the vet wanted to put him down.

    Meg sent him back to San Antonio with her father-in-law in the fall of 2010. In June 2011, she was visiting and found her dog cowering in the back yard, starving and obviously abused. We think that the guy was trying to make him aggressive to guard his business, but Conner doesn't have an aggressive cell in his body.

    I paid for his vet bills and told Meg to get him well and to train him to help me with motility. In October, I flew to Arkansas to visit and flew back to CA with Conner.
    Now he goes everywhere with me. I have trouble on curbs and steps, so Conner will stiffen when I tell him "hold" so that I can lean on him to go up the step. He even helps me out of the shower! He happily lies under the table when we go to restaurants, and loves it when we take a trip to San Francisco and stay in a motel. He is now healthy, happy and a little bit spoiled.

    I know that you aren't ready to make this kind of decision right now, but it might be something for you to consider in the future.
    Love & Hugs,
    Marla

  5. The Following User Says Thank You to magistramarla For This Useful Post:

    steve.b (12-17-2011)

  6. #125
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    Thank you, Marla... maybe I will check into it.

    I don't understand when people have animals they abuse and neglect them..I just cannot comprehend it. I am so glad you two found each other. My dog Riley each day she does get a day older, but I see her literally age each day in front of my eyes. I could never imagine neglecting her. Right now she is bundled in a heating blanket on low. I love her and will miss her dearly when her time cones. I think it will be soon from just old age. Hugs..me.
    I have Lupus. So *^#@! what.

  7. #126
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    Hugs to you too, Amanda...OX
    I have Lupus. So *^#@! what.

  8. #127
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    Quote Originally Posted by magistramarla View Post
    Oluwa,
    I think that you would be a perfect candidate for a service dog. They can be trained to help with motility, as mine does, or to help with psychological needs. I met a lady the other day who has a note from her doctor that allows her to carry her little service dog everywhere with her because it helps to prevent panic attacks.
    You might like my dog's story:
    My daughter bought Conner, a pure-bred German Shepherd, in early 2007 and trained him to be her "demo-dog" when she was training other dogs. She married an Airman and they were stationed in Arkansas in 2009. Conner was allergic to something there, and his eczema was so bad, the vet wanted to put him down.

    Meg sent him back to San Antonio with her father-in-law in the fall of 2010. In June 2011, she was visiting and found her dog cowering in the back yard, starving and obviously abused. We think that the guy was trying to make him aggressive to guard his business, but Conner doesn't have an aggressive cell in his body.

    I paid for his vet bills and told Meg to get him well and to train him to help me with motility. In October, I flew to Arkansas to visit and flew back to CA with Conner.
    Now he goes everywhere with me. I have trouble on curbs and steps, so Conner will stiffen when I tell him "hold" so that I can lean on him to go up the step. He even helps me out of the shower! He happily lies under the table when we go to restaurants, and loves it when we take a trip to San Francisco and stay in a motel. He is now healthy, happy and a little bit spoiled.

    I know that you aren't ready to make this kind of decision right now, but it might be something for you to consider in the future.
    Love & Hugs,
    Marla
    Oh Marla,

    What a wonderful story. This is great for Connor and for you, just perfect.

    Debbie
    I may have been dealt a bad hand, but at least I'm still playing with a full deck. ( most of the time anyway).

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    Oluwa (12-22-2011)

  10. #128
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    Oluwa,

    I think Marla has a great idea, when the time is right, you might want to consider it.


    Debbie
    I may have been dealt a bad hand, but at least I'm still playing with a full deck. ( most of the time anyway).

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    Oluwa (12-22-2011)

  12. #129
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    I have been living almost in my day for the last 2.5 days. I don't know how to explain it other than I suppose what I was doing was trying to hold my sick in but I did feel normal, living without thinking about living.

    Very small dinner on Christmas at my house for Christmas...four of us, I went through my thoughts, yes, yes I can handle this glazing a ham and etc. I went to the linen closet to get my table linen and memories, after memories came flooding through...linen for Christmas, linens for summer, fall, Easter, just because linens and all the dinners Bola and I had together..alone, dinner we had with family vacationing at our house..and how many dinners I am not going to have with him. It is just maddening. Christmas I surmise I will have to pretend....so others don't feel uncomfortable. It is exhausting pretending..tight, tight inside all day...I hope no one asks, how are you doing. I will pop....sigh. I feel like all the time this year went flashing back like a roller coaster in reverse to January 6th...

    I wonder if Christmas is quaking inside unbearable already, how will I make it on January 6th. I just don't know what to pray for anymore.....

    Riley is old...I literally see her aging each day. I think her time is really soon.

    I feel like I am in the SC, standing outside during a electrical thunderstorm with an umbrella...I march on.
    I have Lupus. So *^#@! what.

  13. #130
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    [QUOTE=Oluwa;99843]
    It has been a hard year. My father had a heart attack, his kidneys failed and is on dialysis. Bola was killed. Four days later my dearest, closest Aunt died. Pookie died in my arms. My last aunt, living relative by marriage on my Mom's side died. All who came before me on my Mom's side are gone. Just too much reality for me, God. Sigh. I march on.[/QUOT

    Oluwa, I am so sorry for your many loses this year. Please know that you are in many hearts here this holiday season, and that we will be here for you. Nothing can replace a loved one who has gone one, but I hope that you are able to reach out to others around you as time passes and discover that the world is full of people who want you to be a part of their lives - even without the blood ties. Peace be with you this week.

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    Oluwa (12-22-2011)

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