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Thread: I am lost.

  1. #111
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    My heart is with ALL of YOU for all the LOVED ONES lost. Life can be cruel at times and im sorry for that. I like the words Steve wrote. BEAUTIFUL. I lost my grandmother who was more like my MOTHER and it takes a while BUT you WILL get to that place Steve wrote about Marijo. You are on that road NOW MY FRIEND. It all takes time that is VERY PAINFUL but WE ARE HERE FOR YOU. WARM LOVE and HUGS XXXOOO Love You
    We Live in a MORTAL, FRAIL, IMPERFECT world in which the word "FAIR" doesn't always apply.Make EVERY MOMENT COUNT with the ones you LOVE because it can end in the blink of an eye. Love, Jeannette

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    Oluwa (12-13-2011), Saysusie (12-11-2011), steve.b (12-11-2011)

  3. #112
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    Saysusie is offline Super Moderator Super ModeratorEmperor of the Universe
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    I know that this is your first Holiday Season without your beloved Bola and I want you to know that you are in my heart. You have been heavy on my mind as we approach this season and I want to send you my love, hoping that it gives you some comfort and some strength!
    You are so precious as you, even at this time in your grief, still remember to comfort me in my grief. You are, as I've always said, an angel in my life.

    Always
    Saysusie
    Look For The Good and Praise It!

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  5. #113
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    Oluwa,
    We have all missed your presence here so much.
    I know that I can't say much that can really help, but like so many others here at WHL, I an always glad to hear from you, and I hope that my little bit of support can lift your spirits.
    Gentle Hugs,
    Marla

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    Oluwa (12-13-2011)

  7. #114
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    Thank you everyone for reading me. I pray God blesses us with comfort in our ailing sick bodies and our sad hearts for various reasons this season of when Jesus Christ was born and always. Please Dear God bring us comfort, security, peace, love, health, a sense of feeling settled inside from all that ails us. Please shine on us...hear my prayer. Thank you Heavenly Father. Amen.
    I have Lupus. So *^#@! what.

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  9. #115
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    My heart grieves for you and everyone elsewho has lost someone. It's been a very long time since I was in that situation. Holidays have and will be hard. Because of memories, but putting up the front helps make it easier and time does help. hugs, prayers acne the Lords comfort to you all

  10. #116
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    Oh heavens....my Riley Mildred is having seizures again. Two last night. Grand Mal. They started when I went to the midwest this summer to bring my Bola's ashes home for a graveside service. She is on phenobarbital. I wonder what was the trigger...food? I fear. I feel the same heaviness in my heart and chest again when Pookie developed cancer and died this September. Stress. I panic, my little family is almost all gone..not her too. I know it is inevitable as she 16.5, but God...not again. I am not going to ask for strength, as I feel I the pain in life is what gives you strength. I want comfort...peace. I am not that strong, I can't endure it, not this soon, not now.

    It has been a hard year. My father had a heart attack, his kidneys failed and is on dialysis. Bola was killed. Four days later my dearest, closest Aunt died. Pookie died in my arms. My last aunt, living relative by marriage on my Mom's side died. All who came before me on my Mom's side are gone. Just too much reality for me, God. Sigh. I march on.
    I have Lupus. So *^#@! what.

  11. #117
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    Oluwa,
    You have had a rough year. The new year is almost here - I hope that it is a much better one for you.
    Hugs,
    Marla

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  13. #118
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    dear oluwa mau god bless you my friend and my hopes and prays are with you luv and hugs

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  15. #119
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    Oh Marijo, so SORRY about your father as well. I want to give you THAT HUG my FRIEND , in the WORST WAY! Please try to get as much comfort as you can from your family here. WE LOVE YOU SO MUCH! You are STRONGER than you THINK, the PAIN is making you FEEL weak, BUT YOU ARE NOT. Memories that make YOU SMILE, remember, THAT CANT be taken from you my FRIEND. Make NEW ones with the ones that are still here for YOU. Add some new furrry babies to your life when the time is right for YOU. You KNOW they make GREAT memories! I also wanted to tell you that we have a new furry family member that gets seizures and is on the same meds as Riley. He is 8 and he was our neighbors dog. She had to sell her house and she couldnt find a home for him before moving into her apartment, so, he's now OUR FURRY BABY! We saved him and it FEELS GOOD! We now have 3 doggies! My Lucky is 14, My Calli is 11 and i know their getting old, which makes me sad, BUT i also know they have made our family HAPPY with so many WARM MEMORIES. They will take a piece of me when they go to doggy heaven. PLEASE take care of YOURSELF and cuddle cuddle cuddle as much as possible with your Riley! WARM HUGS and LOVE! XXXOOO
    We Live in a MORTAL, FRAIL, IMPERFECT world in which the word "FAIR" doesn't always apply.Make EVERY MOMENT COUNT with the ones you LOVE because it can end in the blink of an eye. Love, Jeannette

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  17. #120
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    Thank you for reading me and sharing yourself too....hugs. Riley hasn't had another seizure. I suspect her getting into Pookie's organic treats is the trigger for her seizures as I found she got into the bag again, in the closet while I was out. They went into the trash! The seizure prior, a few months back, she gnawed a hole in the bag that day too. I am now wondering if her seizures are actually from food types or maybe not , as they started at my brother house while I was away. Maybe just a trigger and not the onset cause...

    Jeanette, I am not sure about anymore animals..perhaps, but not any time soon. I fear death, losing anything, anyone now. I am not the same person I was on January 5...January 6th I was changed forever. I feel weak, afraid, lack of confidence, vulnerable. I don't know what to believe anymore and almost everything scares me. I feel connected to nothing. They say it is normal when one loses their spouse to feel this way. It has been a journey...not in a book I've ever read, an emotion I have ever felt. More frightening, anxiety 100-fold than driving on a rural road in the foothills on a rainy night I've never traveled. I learn as I go and quite frankly I am not a very good pupil and nor a good driver when I drove through Northeast Stockton, California area foothills on that rainy day. I was petrified too. Gasping.

    Thank you everyone, very much...one moment at a time...hugs.
    I have Lupus. So *^#@! what.

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