Thank you BonusMom for writing to me. Grief is so individualized, there is no right way or wrong way. What your Mom is feeling could be all of what you asked. I have been reading a book called On Grief and Grieving. I know what I thought was abnormal, really is normal. If your Mom does feel relief, it isn't because she didn't love him..it could be she can do the things she wanted to do. Or if it was an anticipated passing, she may have come to terms with grief while your Dad was still here...so many reasons. No more suffering... Grief is so complex. Ask her..I think she would tell you.....talking about death is a lesson in life we should learn about before it happens. Then I think people would not feel so awkward grieving or consoling another person....
My heart feels empathy for your colleague....it is so hard to grieve and live, if you know what I mean. Life goes on, it doesn't stop so you can grieve.
I am sorry you lost your Dad....how are you feeling about that.
I have Lupus. So *^#@! what.