I hear ya sister! I have a theory on the lost feeling... And it may not be a fit for you, but, this is what I think the lost feeling is for me... I have always been used to not being able to depend on anyone but myself. But, I always knew that I COULD depend on myself. But, now, all of a sudden my own body is attacking itself. So, now it's kind of like, the one thing I could count on in my life, I can't anymore. And that just ADDS to everything I'm already feeling...
As I said, I don't know if that fits for you or not, but, it's a theory... If you ever want to talk, feel free to vent on me, I'm a very good listener!
"All sounds are potentially dangerous.
All sounds are potentially medicinal.
All sounds are beautiful." ~Yoko Ono