There are many, many of us who have traced our Lupus symptoms back to puberty and/or adolescence. So, you are not alone there and you are, probably, absolutely correct in drawing these correlations.
Unfortunately, it is quite common for menstruation to cause a flare-up of Lupus symptoms. In fact, all rheumatic diseases are clinically influenced by menstruation. I don't know if there is a specific Lupus treatment for menstrual problems. Usually, treatment for the underlying disease helps to resolve some of the menstruation issues, but not always. As far as menopause, the disease, itself, can sometimes cause early menopause. As such, the flare-ups due to menstruation cease. However, flare-ups due to other triggers does not cease.
I hope that things get better for you. It is good that you are keeping track of your symptoms, this will help you and your doctor to make informed decisions.
Peace and Blessings
Look For The Good and Praise It!