First of all i want to say WOW you are beautiful!!! I know when sickness strikes,depression kicks in.That chatter in your mind is the depression talking.It can convince you...yes this is it...im on my own for life...noone will ever want me.But you know what.....you will be surprised.When you ''accept'' your sickness and begin to feel a touch better....life will not seem so bleak.
A couple of nights ago, as i too suffer with depression and anxiety...i sat here typing messages to members.....i was so low.I am the patient who is feeling like a hypochondriac.I am that 1% who has'nt got the diagnosis of whats wrong with me.They say i have LUpus...then not....they say i have chronic fatigue syndrome...then not.....now again being tested for lUPUS again.I know even before the bloods come back....they'll say im 'normal'.I feel so sick and left a very nice life behind.Well nicer than now.
I will admit something...and yes you and everyone will think...ooooooooow smelly girl.....but for 2 days i couldnt get out of bed.Depression and pain and life....oh i could not cope.Today in the UK we had our first Hot n sunny day.SO....i challenged depression....got up....finally had a bath then went shopping and then sat in the garden ....oh and had a pub lunch.I couldnt walk for swollen legs....but i felt good for doing it....knackered but good.So.....in the future.....take one day at a time.Think of only an hour ahead.Thinking to the future makes you worry...or with me it does anyway.You...one day....will find 'someone'.I know this cause i too thought like you.Then when i was'nt expecting it...found someone.....who likes me for me....illness and non bathing too lol.(I do bath every day...im not smelly all the time lol). So try not to predict the future......everything is already written....and you wont be alone.PLus....we are all here now...to help you along your journey.
Sending gentle hugs
I am still here,just been on new meds so unable to function like i used to.I will pop back,just know im thinking of you all and hoping you are keeping on keeping on.xxxxxxx