Im so sorry Canwerecover. You have received GREAT information and support from the others,i mirror so MANY of their words. I have to tell you that i have been ill for 3 yrs now and it was HARD for my Whole family mostly in the beginning. Still is and always will be, but whats helped is my husband educated himself and is there at every turn i take and it has actually brought us CLOSER. I let him know every flare i have whether its BIG or small so he and my children know where moms at for that day,emotionally,mentally and physically. We dont dwell on it or focus on it but they can adjust there day to it as well with the understanding that its not them ,its my illness. There are days i can play games with them and days i cant. They KNOW why when i cant. I guess what im saying is your wife NEEDS to be HONEST with herself,you,family and friends from day to day. The ones who really care and UNDERSTAND will make changes themselves to better deal with it. HONESTY on a daily basis about ME and how i feel that day is whats worked BEST for me and the people in my life. Everyone around her needs to know the ins and outs of WHY she acts like she does and feels like she feels. Im not saying dwell on it, just Understand it. You are Great for being here to do just that. You and your wife are in my thoughts.
She also needs to realize, the More stressed she is the WORSE it will be for her,her symptoms and the people around her. Maybe she should cut back her hours at wrk? Go to therapy? Jump on this forum to relate to others? Both of you do whats IN your POWER to make it "OK". Its hard but its doable. Good Luck