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Thread: Been sick ready for my eternal home but God isn't listening to me!

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    Default Been sick ready for my eternal home but God isn't listening to me!

    Hi there sorry I haven't been on been sick really really sick lately. I ended up with boils all over the front of my skin. Then I got sick started up chucking blood had to have an upper endoscope done found that my stomach and small intestine has ulcers from another bacterial infection and a valve that goes from my stomach to the small intestine isn't working right so I have bile where there shouldn't be bile. Sorry if this is grafic and gross but this is what I have been dealing with for weeks now. I can't seem to get the medical field to help me find out why this is happening or whats causing this other than my immune system has gone haywire. DUH!

    Like the title says I have been ready to give up my pain and want to go to my erternal home where there is promises of no more pain, no more tears. Today is no better than yesterday, I ate solid food my stomach hurts like crap. I have a rash on my arms that has been there since Nov 08 but can't get anyone to listen tooo me. My pastor and elders have prayed over me and I know I am a long way from going "home". I am just tired of the fight.

    RedHairAngel

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    Default hi

    Hi,

    Oh you poor thing.Oh i wish i could take that pain away and make you feel better right now.Oh, please dont give up.I know it must feel that way now.....but it has to get better soon. I just hope you can get someone to help you find out what the problem is and treat you properly. I am thinking of you and sending you gentle hugs. We are all here, so when ever you feel well enough please come here, just even for some kind words.Wish i could send you something better than a hug, but thats all i have. You keep strong and know we are thinking of you.

    lots of love
    and lots of wishes of you feeling better soon
    Angel.xxx
    I am still here,just been on new meds so unable to function like i used to.I will pop back,just know im thinking of you all and hoping you are keeping on keeping on.xxxxxxx

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    Unhappy

    Oh Red Hair Angel.....I am so, so sorry for your horrible suffering. I have been right where you are so many times...just so sick of the tremendous pain and all the awfulness that goes with this rotten disease....I have begged God to take it all away and let me have relief...and then have cried because He sees fit to leave me here on Earth to suffer some more. Sometimes we just don't have another single drop of energy to fight the fight anymore...we feel weak and tired. So tired that we could sleep forever. It is so hard to understand why we must suffer and experience what we go through...unfortunately, God sees the big picture and we do not get to. At least not during our time here.

    But He does have a purpose for it...He does have a plan that we must trust. He does not abandon us, though it feels like it sometimes. He gives us a promise that we are never, ever alone and that when we reach the point of utter despair, He will carry us in His arms.

    Our lives weave a path that, many times, do not have meaning to us at the moment....but as we travel that path and endure and grow and deepen our relationship with others and with Him, He brings people that cross our path. People that help us and people that we can help. There is much to be learned from what we endure during our travels on the path...things that we learn about ourself....like what kind of person you choose to be with your time here on Earth...

    I wish that no one had to suffer, especially you. I wish that I could take some of your despair for you...It's a helpless feeling to know that someone has reached that point and wants it to be over. But please don't give up. Please endure this one day and try to have hope for tomorrow. And please know that my heart aches for you, though I do not know you, and that I will be praying for you earnestly.

    I'm sending you gentle, caring, HUGS and peaceful thoughts to help you find the desire to carry on.

    I will be thinking of you, Redhairangel....and asking God to take away your pain and help you and your doctors find answers.

    Fondly,

    Lori

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    Dear dear Sister,

    So sorry you are suffering, it seems like more than you can bear. It is hard to bear just knowing what you are going through, very heartbreaking. One time I cried out to our Dad, "why did you create me to suffer? What was the point because I'm not seeing the point!" Sometimes we just have to vent, He understands. The journey to the other side can be misery incarnate. Some days all I can pray is "Jesus help me."

    Jesus please ease our sisters suffering. Lord her body is broken and her heart is yearning for home. Give her the strength to bear this out. Take this heavy burden from her Lord we pray. Father please guide her doctors, place your hand on all of her medical needs that they will find the right answers and the right medicine to heal her stomach and intestines. Touch her Lord according to Your will.

    Lift her up sweet Jesus, protect her. Surround her with your angels, and loyal friends who will pray and comfort her. Bless her with that peace only You can give, fill her until she is overflowing with your true Spirit. We yearn for the City of God and the Holy Light that fills the temple. Hold us tight until we meet You there. Thank you Lord.

    Love in Christ,
    Last edited by AyahsClan; 03-17-2009 at 11:53 AM. Reason: spelling
    Ayah
    Believe in Tomorrow - Appreciate Today
    http://twitter.com/LupieAyah

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    Default

    Hi Red Hair Angel,

    I am going to echo what Rastagirl said. God knows the path; unfortunately we don't. Please do not give up. I am praying for you and I hope your pain eases soon. Push the doctors for answers-call, call and call. Do you have a family member who can help you out with getting a second opinion?

    Sending you gentle hugs and prayers.

    God Bless,

    Faith

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    It is very sad to hear that you are suffering so. Too many people in so much pain.
    IMHO it's ok to feel as you do. Hoping the day ends must bring you some relief from it all.
    Your faith will comfort you but science will save you. Fight or have a loved one fight for you to receive proper medical treatment. make yourself heard.
    I hope you have better days ahead.

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    Goodness Redhairedangel,

    You have been greatly ill...It reminds me of Job. He had all those boils on his body..hmm I wonder if he was striken with Lupus or another autoimmune?

    I do understand wanting to give up the fight...I have been recently having those thoughts. I am praying some comfort for you...like a remission...the only bright side to this is that you are a Christian and have the Lord to hang on to. I am not sure what I would to if I didn't have Him to go to. Know that He is there and He knows and sees..One of the Holy Spirit's names is Comfortor...I am also going to pray that you are able to experience the Peace that passes all understanding...that is the peace that we can feel even though all Hell is breaking loose around us...it doesn't mean the situation is miraculusly made perfect and we all lived happily ever after, just means that we can experience peace and even Joy..which is a fruit of the spirit. I find when I am there it is only when I have finally given everything to God, because there is nothing I can do anyway...at that point and only then can I move on.
    I have promises to keep and miles to go before I sleep, and miles to go before I sleep.......Robert Frost

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    rob is offline Super Moderator Super ModeratorEmperor of the World
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    RedHairAngel,

    I have had some bad stomach problems lately too, but not as severe as yours have been. It's hell, and sometimes I feel like giving up the fight. But I don't. Sooner or later, a good day will come around and give you the energy and motivation you need to keep on fighting. That's what keeps me going. I hope the stomach problem heals up fast. Just know that you are in the thought and prayers of many people, including me.

    Rob

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    Hi Red Head Angel!
    Sorry to hear you are going through a tuff time and have for the past few weeks but you are FAITH FILLED and giving up is not an option even when you feel like there is no hope. GOD Is hope and ITS NOT OVER UNTIL GOD SAYS ITS OVER!!! Please know that this too shall pass and although there are no answers for what you are going through and perhaps you will never receive answers from the medical field you will get through this and these conditions will subside. I never thought I would be out of pain and I am vertually pain free now. You have to keep the faith and keep talking and praying. Keep people around you who make you laugh as I really do believe laughter heals everything!

    I am praying for your recovery and wellness as you deserve to feel GREAT!!! You have Lupus...IT doesn't have you!!! YOU ARE A VICTOR not a VICTUM!!!

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    Darlin, Sometimes, we find ourselves in a position where we have to take responsibility for our own health improvements. When doctors don't seem to be helping,it is time to become an active partner in your recovery. I am not saying to exclude medical doctors, but what I am saying is, when I got in those predictments, and doctors didn't or wouldn't help me, I started looking for alternative treatments. I started with Nutional doctors, and started reading, on my own, all kinds of nutritional, and vitamin books , and taught myself about the positive and negative use of vitamins, and natural juices (made at home using a juicer). I figure God made every thing in a natural form to help my lupus quiet down, long before drugs (with side effects) were invented in a laboratory in a testube I bought books and a juicer and began to learn about which vegetables and fruites when juiced could calm my symptoms down. Low and behold, I started following the advise of several Neutrational doctors, and juicing,and after a while I started to feel better.I tried explaining to my MD what I was doing but he just knew that drugs were better, so, I quite telling him, and soon I was feeling well enough that he cut the dosage of my drugs way down. All he could figure out was that my lupus had been responding wonderfully to his drugs, and I nevere told him any different. TEE HEE.
    You don't have to be a victum of lupus. By learning how to help myself, I began to feel like I was helping to battle my disease, and that took away a lot of my depression lupus had laid on me. You will be surprised at the strength to battle lupus you poscess. Allso, you have got to start practing positive thinking. Our minds re very strong, and can do a lot to make even lupus synptoms less painful. One way I learned to cope was to give lupus different names when it hit various parts of my body.(sounds dumb, but it worked for me) It would make me so angry that I was determined to get (name) out of my (where ever the pain was hitting). I read, and I jused, and I asked God to help me. I was sick and tired of the stupid pain, and I was determined to beat it.
    You have to get determined darlin. Educate yourself, and find yourself a good Nutritional doctor to help you, but don't exclude your MD Doctor. you need him too. I will pray that your problems will quiet down for you. I have asked God to take me home many times too over the 39 years that I have been fighting lupus, but guess that isn't our call. When he is ready for us, we will go home, but untill that time, we have to become educated partners, in fighting our lupus.I did it. You can do. God bless.
    Preshad.

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