another dr. appt.....yuk
thought i would take a turn venting and questioning. I have been feeling worse each day for about 2 weeks now. The last time this happened, I tried on my own to wait for the flare to end. It just got worse, and I ended up basically non-functional. This time, i decided to try a different approach.
I called my rheumie's office (i do like and have confidence in my dr. and her staff), to see if i could get into dr. soon. No way...it is spring break and she is gone....but i was able to get in to see her physician's assistant today. I jumped on the opportunity and me and my girls went and this is what happened,
I explained to her that i was trying to warrant off a further spiral. I also told her that at my last visit with rheumie, the dr. said methotrexate was the next step. The assistant said they could not start methotrexate while i am in a flare....she must first get me out of the flare,....so she gave me a medrol (steroid) injection plus sent me home with a prescription for a steroid pack, if the injection does not give me relief. I have no reason to question her, I am just frustrated because it seems that everything that is in my mind about the next step, keeps getting interrupted and changed. It is hard enough for me to remember all of this much less changes.
She did not take any bloodwork, but looked back several months and said all of my bloodwork looks great except the ANA. So now, my girls are confused, and they don't know if we are treating the correct disease. I try to explain the bloodwork fluctuates with meds and if i am in flare. they just shrug, and say this is too confusing. Today, i feel like i am being questioned again....and this puts me in a really bad mood.
So, even though it is my goal to live with lupus without long-term side effects from steroids, this is my second injection of 120 mg in 3 months. I feel like i have let myself down just because of being weakened by flare, and by uncertainty.
She poked and squeezed various places, and said most of my pain was fibromyalgia. She said the shoulder pain was fms....but i have never seen this particular area listed as a trigger point. So, now i question if i can even tell the difference between sle and fms. I have so many questions but not the energy to answer them.
Also, i detected an attitude from her when I mentioned being a member of a forum. My dr. is glad that i have this group to learn from. So, i don't kow, I just came away feeling like I want to pull the covers over my head and see if maybe tomorrow will be better.
thanks for suffering through this,
share a smile today
I did not suffer anything reading this post you are entitled to write this and we all want to help you in any way.
I am glad you got the appointment and can understand your frustration that your own doctor was'nt there. I can understand what you mean when she didnt take new blood works and just looked at your notes. I am sure she must know what the score is. Try not to worry about this as you can see your own Doctor when she or he gets back. I so hope the injection has helped if only a little. I hope the prodding she did has'nt made the pain any worse and hope it begins to ease.Yes you will get attitude at letting her know you are in a forum, cause they think....'oh self diagnosing'. Its not that though, its the fact you are armed with the very best knowledge and i think that threatens them.TOUGH! Good on you for telling her.You knew what the score was you see and she couldnt fob you off.
Dont feel down about the appointment.Well done to you i say!!!
I really hope many people post here for you and give you everything you need to help you through this.
Sending very gentle hugs