I'm surprised that your doctors did not explain Plaquenil to you. While Plaquenil is one of the best tolerated drugs for the treatment of Lupus, it can take up to three (3) or more months before you begin to see the real benefits. However, once the Plaquenil starts to work, it does help with the fatigue and most of the skin issues present with Lupus. Most doctors will prescribe Prednisone with the Plaquenil so that patients can get quicker relief from their symptoms. It is generally hoped that, once the Plaquenil kicks in, the Prednisone can be tapered off. It might be beneficial for you to talk to your doctor about adding a treatment to your Plaquenil so that you can get some relief.
Lifestyle changes are imperative for us Lupus sufferers. We each have had to tailor our changes to our particular circumstances. There are many members here with small children who can probably give you better advice than I on how to get recuperative rest and regular exercise while managing a home and children. All that I can do is to stress that doing the two are very important. It was suggested by a member that we should make a list of those things that we want to accomplish in our day, and then cut that list in half. Always put aside some time to get some rest (perhaps you can nap when you put your children down for their naps). Do all that you can to avoid stress as it can literally kill us by causing flare-ups or worsening our symptoms.
Eat a healthy diet, try to eat only fresh foods and reduce (or eliminate) your intake of red meats. Avoid alfalfa sprouts as they are known to exacerbate some Lupus symptoms.
STAY OUT OF THE SUN!! If you must be in the sun, make sure that you cover your entire body with sunscreen with a minimum SPF of 35. Also, wear loose fitting clothing that covers your body, wear sunglasses and hats. Never over-exert yourself and, if you feel tired...stop and rest.
I am sure that others will be along with some excellent advice. I wish you the best of luck.
Peace and Blessings