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Thread: How to deal with hopelessly ignorant people!

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    Default How to deal with hopelessly ignorant people!

    I decided to bring this to the forum. Yesterday I was in the Walmart talking with the pharmacist about a medication and I mentioned that I have Lupus and was wondering if an over the counter medication would be ok to take for chest congestion. Well after the pharmacist told me that this medication should be ok, a lady stopped me when I went to walk away and said, "You have Lupus?" I told that I do and she proceeded to tell me all about a friend of hers who had just recently passed away from it. Before I got the chance to say anything, she said well you are going to die and aren't you scared? I was shocked at her and I got upset and said that eventually we are all going to die, because eventually everyone will have something go terribly wrong with their health if they don't die in an accident or something like that. It just makes me so mad when people are rude like this. I just walked away from her and left her standing there. How should I have handled this situation.

    Hugs,
    Kathy
    Lupus for many years. Like most of my life. Sjogrens that started at 35 and Scoliosis, Spinal Stenosis, Degenerative Disc Disease, Osteo-Arthritis of the spine, Ankylosing Spondilitis, Periferal Neuropathy, mild CP and now just recently diagnosed with PA. I had a disc replaced in December of 2007.

    Medications:
    Plaquenil, Sulindac, Imuran, Celiac diet, Tramadol and B12 shot once a month.

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    I think you handled it pretty well. Maybe leaving her just standing there made her feel akward. Hopefully she learned blurting things out is rude. People need to learn its not a death sentence anymore, just means your going to have to take extra care of yourself. Something we all need to do anyways. People live with this disease a long time, doesn't mean that will cause their death.

    You should have never been put on the spot like that, :x shame on her for doing that to you.
    Cheryl

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    rob is offline Super Moderator Super ModeratorEmperor of the World
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    It's hard to believe that such ignorance exists, but it does. I think you handled it just fine. Better than I would have handled it. Ignorance brings out the ugly side of me, and I forget that diplomacy is the better route.

    Now, with that out of the way, I would have told her that yes, there is a chance that I will die from complications of SLE. But the differenence between you and I lady, is that I won't die ignorant. Now get out of my face Nurse Ratchet, I want to watch the damn baseball game! All of that of course, would be in my best Jack Nicholson voice.

    But that's just me. You handled it fine Kathy.

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    Just as you did.

    Some people!! Good grief.

    Kasey

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    Rob - We are cut from the same cloth....must be the New England thing...I assume you meant the Red Sox when you referred to the @#$%# baseball game, right?? Never, EVER get in the way of the Red Sox!!!

    Love your reply
    Kathy, you handled yourself with dignity and class - something this woman couldnt SPELL if she had to..kudos
    Love Lauri
    For God has not given us a spirit of fear; but of power, love and a sound mind. 2 Timothy 1:7

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    rob is offline Super Moderator Super ModeratorEmperor of the World
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    Hey there Lauri,

    It certainly is a New England thing, and I am a Red Sox fan. But, my reference to the baseball game is from the movie "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest". Jack Nicholson is a sane man who has been commited to a mental hospital. He befriends pretty much everyone there, except for the mean, evil Nurse Ratchet, who treats all the patients terribly and believes there is no hope for them whatsoever. Jack wants to watch the world series on the only TV the hospital has, but the evil nurse/warden will not allow it. So, he gets angry and tells her that he, and the other patients want to watch the baseball game, instead of the crap she makes them watch every day. It's really a good, but sad movie.

    I was thinking about the lady Kathy encountered. It occured to me that I know a bunch of people who are cancer survivors. What if you went up to a person with cancer and asked them what it's like to know they will die of cancer. That makes about as much sense as asking how you feel about dying of Lupus when the facts show that many, many people with lupus do not die from it. Some folks are just plain stupid I guess.

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    Default Ignorant People

    It is very difficult to deal with ignorant people. Recently, I have found my patience very thin with ignorance. Some people just don't think before they speak. Don't get me wrong, I know I am not perfect, but I try very hard to think before I speak and to be sensitive to other peoples feelings.

    I have had people tell me I am going to die from this disease also.
    But here I am still kicking and I truly believe I have had this illness since a teenager. That means I have lived with this illness for over 30 years now and still going strong.

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    Wow!
    I have never understood how people can be so blunt/rude with someone they do not even know. BOUNDRIES?! I realize in this case it was due to her ignorance but I have to say you handled just right. I, unfortunately, would have probably just stood there saying "Wow".

    props to you Kathy!

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    Hi Drinkofwater,

    The Rheumatologist believes that I have hae SLE, Lupus since the age of 5 years old. I will be 50 in December and I am still here and still kicking. I don't intend to die any time soon. Some people are just hopelessly ignorant big time.

    Hugs,
    Kathy
    Lupus for many years. Like most of my life. Sjogrens that started at 35 and Scoliosis, Spinal Stenosis, Degenerative Disc Disease, Osteo-Arthritis of the spine, Ankylosing Spondilitis, Periferal Neuropathy, mild CP and now just recently diagnosed with PA. I had a disc replaced in December of 2007.

    Medications:
    Plaquenil, Sulindac, Imuran, Celiac diet, Tramadol and B12 shot once a month.

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    OMG Rob -
    How could I miss that punch line?? I LOVE that movie!! It is a classic...My brain doesnt keep up like it used to, you know?? BTW - I did receive your PM...Im sorry I havent written back sooner...My computer time has been REALLY down since my son found an online game for the new Star Wars animated movie....he obsessed!!
    Thanks for writing...glad youre hanging in there - if you can do it, I can do it!!
    Talk soon -
    Lauri
    For God has not given us a spirit of fear; but of power, love and a sound mind. 2 Timothy 1:7

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