I dunno Kasey, I think a lupus clonocin might be helpful...
So sorry to hear you're not doing well at the moment, if you can take Lauri's suggestion and find a 'helper' to get the kids occupied and wtched for a half day (or heck, for a week if you can ship 'em to a camp or a grandparent, or a loving aunt in the next state....) do so.
We're all sending loving gentle hugs - and have hope that the clonocin/Clinic is in your future as well.
~"I find hope in the darkest of days, and focus in the brightest. I do not judge the universe." (Dalai Lama)