The last two weeks have been horrible. I just need to vent a little bit. I am 26 and have had lupus since I was 21. Its been a long road but I making getting though it. But these last two weeks have been beyond stressful. Basically my boss is not an understanding person. I was written up two weeks ago for missing so much work and she told be that if I miss more then 3 days in the next 60 days I will be fired. I tried explaining to her that I was waiting for the FMLA paperwork to come though. She just told me until it came though I would still get in trouble if I missed work. I have worked for this company before I was diagnosed and the thing is I never called off before I got sick. And even then I only missed 2.5 weeks if work after I was diagnosed and 1 of those weeks I was in the hospital. But last year I kept on getting infections in my legs that would have me out of work for a week or two because I was unable to walk. And this really mad my boss mad. So back to the point of my stress. I finally got the FMLA paperwork that said I was approved which I was very happy about. Then last weekend I get this weird rash on my neck. At first I didn't think anything of it but then I was getting horrible pains in my neck and scalp. I pushed though the pain and worked all week and then went to the Doctor on Friday. I know I should have gone sooner but this was before I got the FMLA paperwork and I was afraid of getting in for trouble at work. Well it turns out I have shingles. Which is just a new level of hell. So I didn't do anything all weekend because between the pain and the pain meds I was too dizzy to do anything. Then Monday rolls around and I get up and start getting ready for work. Well I have a mini melt down. I am in so much pain. I can't take the Norco during the day because it makes me too dizzy so all I could take is Tylenol which does nothing. So my dad (who is the best person in my life) told me to just call off and if they give me any grief he will call a lawyer. So I called off which I hate doing but the pain was too much. Now it is 2:00AM and I can't sleep because my joints feel like they are going t explode and my head and where the shingles rash is, is killing me. The norco isn't helping. So I am thinking I will be calling off again in the morning. I just hate this. I hate never having money because all I do is pay medical bills. Which seems never ending. I never go out or hang with my friends because I am so tired from working 40 hours a week. I haven't been on a date and God knows how long. And even if I meet a guy I would have the energy to do anything. I just want to be a normal 26 year old. Sorry to be so down. I am just going though a hard time right now. This is the only place I can come and I know I wont be judged and people will understand. I just have to hold out 2 more years with my job and my dad will be about to help me out more financially. He said I will be able to quit my job and he will pay for my health insurance. Well I got a lot off my chest. So for the long ramblings. I am hoping for a better tomorrow
I have been there with a boss like that, I had to deal with her and everyone else. They didn't care about my health. Only wanted the work done. You need to find a happy place in your mind where you can try to be stress free. When I was working I set a date in my head and started a countdown. It helped, also thinking all I need to do is make it to the weekend. Weekends devoted to being stress free with friends and family. I don't know where you are, but sitting quietly by an open window with the breeze blowing calms me. Think of ways to calm yourself and relax. Shut out the world for even a minute or two at works helps. Don't laugh, but at work I used to sit on the john with a scarf thrown over my head and close my eyes. I wish I was on the beach or at Disneyworld. I'd tell my muscles to relax; this helped me.
As for living a normal life, I've no advice. I didn't have a happy marriage, I only have my wonderful kids and their families. Try to relax and go with the flow; life will come to you as it's meant to be.
Last edited by Nonna; 02-26-2014 at 09:27 AM.