You are on the way, I think. You'll see, when you face this thing head on, it will get easier.
I was fortunate, I guess, that I was diagnosed with this Lupus thing, at age 50, so all the kids were on their own, having their own families. It must be very hard to be this sick and having to deal with small children. When I am sick, in pain and exhausted, I lay down and don't care about the household or anything, but you can't do that, I feel for you and all the other young mothers here.
I deal with things pretty well, it didn't take me too long, to tell myself, " deal with it, because it is not going to go away, ever". Maybe, just maybe, because of that, I have never been depressed. Don't get me wrong, I do have days, where I feel sorry for myself, when I am in alot of pain and I have cried, when I can't move, because every move hurts. A good cry can help.
Luckely, I have found this forum and my extended family here on WHL, that has helped alot. Plus my husband is very understanding, loving and helpful.
This was just my experience, yours might be different.
Just remember, that we are here for you and we do understand, first hand, what you are going through.
Hopefully you can find your way,soon.
I may have been dealt a bad hand, but at least I'm still playing with a full deck. ( most of the time anyway).