First let me say welcome to our family here! You will find this site very comforting, helpful and supportive!
You are very normal going through the feelings you are. In a way you do go through the morning period because you have lost someone......your old self. It is hard to accept limitations when you are used to having none. Especially you being in the military, new bride and mother to young little ones. You have a lot so adjustment and change in a very short bit of time. I started getting sick at 21. I was told by the doctors that it was not about the quantity of life you live but the quality of life I lived. It is very beautiful if you think about it but to me that was giving in and refused to stop fighting. I went through the stages of greif when it came to my disease. I know people don't like to admit it but for me I went to a therapist who helped me understand this process and reassured me this was normal. She really helped me figure out these new limitations and what they would mean in my life. It was not pretty and I will tell you it was hard but I ended up on the other end a happier more accepting individuals..
I remember someone asked me how we do it. I told them you may not decide what whole you fall in but you can decide how you come out on the other side. I told them I may come out a little more scratched but I will not come out damaged.
You will get through this. Rely on your loved ones and lean on all of us here. We will help you figure out problems and we will be there when you cry and laugh. You have found the best support system because everyone here knows what you are going through. So, hold that chin up as much as you can and feel everything you need to feel and I promise you that you will not emerge out of the other end damaged.
As I grow to understand life less and less,
I learn to love it more and more.
Age 29, Lupus for last 7 years
Medications: Methotrexate, Lyrica, Celebrex, Flexeril, Theophylline, Bactrim, Xopenex, Lisinopril, Ultram