We've had a lot of conversations here about swollen fingers and feet. My feet are exactly like you described, but mine get swollen and numb when I drive or stand on my feet too long also. Mine seems to be Raynaud's Syndrome, which is another one of those AI "friends" that likes to accompany Lupus and Sjogren's.
Stiff and swollen fingers can be a symptom of quite a few things - Raynaud's, Rheumatoid Arthritis, Psoriatic Arthritis, etc.
We've had 20 year old members here complaining of night sweats. It also seems to be common with AI diseases. I'm 54, and I'm currently going through menopause. I've also had docs try to brush it off as "just a part of your age". They said the same thing about the bladder spasms and incontinence that I'm dealing with. I've found that night sweats are common with AI diseases and that bladder spasms are common with Spastic Paraplegia, which one of my docs thinks that I have. I think that the old "just menopause" thing is just an easy out for some docs who don't want to deal with our symptoms.
I think that you should document all of your symptoms and then bring it up at your next appointment.