Next week I make my second trip to the Rheumy doctor. He is suppose to give me the results of my test that he did the first time I went there. I have already had a positive ANA which was done in Aug. along with some other tests where I was told then that I had lupus, but I had to have these other test because I was told that there was something other than lupus attacking my joints and that it was at a high rate. It could be RA but they are not sure.

Since the first visit to the Rheumy doctor there has been a lot going on, I had to go to the emergency room a couple of times and had to go back on the prednisone and then had to start taking insulin which has not made me happy. Now my hair is falling out a more alarming rate than it was the first time I was there and I fear I am going to be bald before you know it. I hate having to go back to the doctor because I never know what to expect from them anymore and I always feel that they have some type of bad news and more medicines for me to take.

It gets hard at times because I don't have many people here I can talk to because most of my family does not know that I have lupus and we feel that it is best that way. The friends that I have well, one dumped me when I told her about the lupus, her words were I am not going to sit and around and watch you be sick so lose my phone number and don't ever call me again. She blocked her phone number so I could not call her, glad that she doesn't live around here anymore cause I want to confront her about what she did to me. "It wouldn't be nice". but who needs her. So you go on your way and do what you can. I do whoever have my husband and a grown son and daughter, the son lives at home which is nice sometimes and he is a big help to talk to but I feel that they are all tired of hearing me talk about medical all the time.

Well with everything that is going on right now I guess I will just have to deal with what ever the doctor has to say when I go back, but at least I am getting somewhere now as for years I was not getting anywhere, bad thing is back then I had health insurance and now I don't have any which makes things even harder and because of it I may have to move in next door to my mother in law which I feel is not going to be cool, my husband seems think that things will be better then. I don't cause we can't stand each other. Oh well we will see where that goes.

thanks for letting me rant.

take care everyone