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Thread: Bikini Top & Depression

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    Default Bikini Top & Depression

    My fun adventures with my Ruhmey and GP Rant......

    First today I woke up and my fingers were sore, I couldnít put a bra on so I wore my bikini top ha-ha better than nothing right. Ok so first appointment was with my Ruhmy, I told everything from my work stress, to my going to the gym 3x a week to the vertigo to not sleeping. Of course when i was talking about work i got all emotional and tears just kept coming! Well he said he can read between the lines and tell Iím DEPRESSED!!! (At this point am like WTF mate?) And he gave me a prescription for antidepressants.
    Next I went to see my GP (family doctor) and we went over my blood tests results and I told him what my Ruhmy said and of course the tears came out and he asked me all the questions about depression (sex drive, suicide, homicidal and hopelessness) after all that he came to conclusion that Iím not depressed but I am (confused so am I) but then he said its seems my job is a huge source of my stress. He said I 3 outcomes and those 3 are: 1) quit my job, 2) use the EAP (Employee Assistant Plan- talk therapy) 3) Try the anti depressants.

    So I leave and go see my mother where I have total breakdown of what has occurred today and honestly I thought about it and thought about it and Ii canít see it. I go out with my friends, I go to the gym! I laugh and play and goof off! I enjoy life! Yes I have my bad days but doesnít everyone??
    So what to do now! My GP (family doctor) wants to see me back into 2 weeks and I figure that I will take advantage of option 2- talk therapy! And see how that goes and then go see him.
    To be honest Today was the first day where I felt depressed, caught off the world because that stupid word.

    AmandaPanda
    "We're all in the same game, just different levels. Dealing with the same hell, just different devils.

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    Oh honey I could have written this post when I first started going to the doctor! Every time I walked in I started to cry like a baby and they instantly thought I was depressed. Thinking about it after I realized they were right. I was depressed. One of the things this disease does is mess with the chemicals in your brain on top of the stress of being ill.. so yea, I was depressed but I had a right to be! I balked at the anti depressants at first but eventually I agreed to go on some temporarily. It was one of the best things I did. It did NOT mean that I stopped going to the doctors or making them FIND OUT what was wrong with me but it did allow me to settle down a bit.
    I had to get to the point where I didn't see depression/anxiety as a weakness. I am willing to take pills for all of the other things that Lupus does to me so why have an issue with this one? While I am NOT saying if you have depression or not what I am saying is to think it through really hard and if that is one of the things you need then get it without feeling bad about yourself.

    Now, as for the doctors... on that too I can relate! Being dismissed is one of the worst things to go through. All I can say is keep fighting! Make them listen. Keep copies of any blood work. Do their job for them! Keep bugging them until they hear you. They work for you and if they don't listen then fire them and find another!

    Remember that we are here for you!

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    i take depression medication.
    my brain does not function properly without it.

    i am not in a gloomy depressed state.
    my brain is not functioning properly.

    it is medication nothing more nothing less.

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    I have always advocated that for us, it is just as important that we care for our emotional health as it is that we care for our physical health. There are symptoms of this illness that require us to take medications to alleviate those symptoms or to prevent them from worsening.

    I found this information at the LFA website:
    Depression is a very real symptom of any disease that affects the brain. SLE is a disease that can affect the brain. Additionally, we all can attest to the fact that Lupus does impact our lives on emotional levels, not just physical levels. So, here again, depression is very common amongst us for more than one reason. We rightfully feel depressed or anxious primarily because of changes in our physical appearance - Because of the effect of lupus on the way we feel physically (especially in terms of joint and muscle pain). Obviously, these experiences can put quite a damper on your self-esteem and your quality of life.
    One of the things that we often do here at WHL in order to help one another is to provide each other with suggestions on how we can try to take some control of our health and, subsequently, our lives. You may find that depression and anxiety correlate directly with the amount of control that you feel that you have over your life and your health.

    Please know that itís O.K. to feel sad or angry, but don't give up completely; take note of the big and little things that are going right?

    Some things that you can do:
    "What can you do or think about that brings you joy? What does define you? Be sure to eat as well as you can, exercise when and how you can. Get enough sleep! Be sure to keep your medical appointments and take your medication as prescribed. These are ways you can help your body, ways you can be in control.
    And donít be afraid to ask for emotional help! This is especially important if you feel that you are feeling depressed and anxious over long periods of time.
    Finally, donít give up. Donít let lupus define who you are ó no matter what."


    Peace and Blessings
    Namaste
    Saysusie
    Look For The Good and Praise It!

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    Omgosh I could have written this thread too! I have been diagnosed 5 yrs and never could or would accept meds for depression, not even when I was having severe delusion features.

    I think I love your PCP. To take the time to talk it through was great. I have used my EAP for counseling and it helped but still the stress of my job and the daily battle with this disease was more than I could take and I am now on antidepression meds. Here is what I discovered. I don't seem to feel so overwhelmed, my pain is less, muscle spasms are less severe, I cry less and I laugh more. Here is the one I like the most. I EAT LESS!

    If you try it for 6 weeks and decide It's not for you then you can go off it slowly and just stay with what you feel is best. You are not a "nut case" because of this. I dreaded it for years & here I am now on it.

    Good luck Honey. Think it through & ultimately do what works for you. Hugs Tammy

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    Add me to the "it could have been written by me" list. When I first starting seeing my GP she kept pushing antidepressants. I told her I didn't need antidepressants, I needed sleep and a break from the pain! I get a good night's sleep and I'd be a very happy camper. Antidepressants are a bandaid, they don't deal with what is causing the depression in the first place, they just make you not care. I'm referring to these particular situations. I realize, in many cases, antidepressants are a good thing but that's another topic. We lupies need a break from lupus. We need a support system (WHL!), we need understanding doctors. We don't need yet another pill. We aren't depressed- we are frustrated and angry but they don't make a pill for that.
    "I'm going to get healthy or die trying"

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    Oh I can totally relate. Like you everytime I talked to any of my eight doctors about my symptoms, I would also cry. Most of them tried to give me anti-depressants and I would reject the idea thinking I've always been so strong and been able to manage every thing so well. Thinking, does this make me a weak person? Fortunately a few months ago I went to a pain management Dr. who suggested anti-depressants to manage the symptoms of my Fibro, but none the less they are anti-depressants. Reluctantly I tried them and realized that although Im not depressed to the point where I am suicidal I am really "sadened' by everything thats going on with me. These little pills, although they are not magic, have helped me deal with all the different emotions I go through. They have helped me out with all my anger, fears, and yes the pain. You should think about it, and at least give them a try, it doesnt' make you a weak person or any less. On the contrary it may give you the strengh to deal better emotionally. Hugs, Mari.

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    If the EAP does not help, consider option 3. Like the others have said, anti-depressants help in many ways. Just because you are given an anti-depressant does not mean you are crazy or going to kill yourself, it just means the brain is not working as it should. I was given zoloft several years ago because my doctors felt I was having anxiety attacks and depression. I didn't think so, but I know that since being on it I do not cry over every little thing and I feel much better about life in general. My husband said he could not believe the difference in my moods and he hopes I never come off it, I think he's afraid of the possible change that could result. This is just what works for me. I hope that the EAP works for you and you can handle things without having to add another pill. Best of Luck and {{{{{HUGS}}}}}
    Sue

    'Friends are like stars.....You don't always see them, but you know they are there.'

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    Thank you WHL!!! you have given me a lot to think about and I'm happy to have you guys! You gave me a different outlook on how to look at this better than my two doctors!

    I will give thought and let you guys know what I choose to do

    thank you!!!!

    AmandaPanda
    "We're all in the same game, just different levels. Dealing with the same hell, just different devils.

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    I feel like antidepressants are prescribed all to readily these days. While its clear that a lot of people require them and do benefit from them I think some doctors prescribe them before trying anything else. I remember the days when I was first diagnosed when all I did was cry because of the pain and a number of people (family, friends) who came to visit me kept asking my parents and boyfriend if I was slipping into a depressive episode because I cried every time I tried to move. I remember crying when I went to the doctors once because I was in a wheelchair and he told me the plaquenil might take about 3-4 months to work. I'm so glad he knew me well enough to realise the crying was a result of frustration and pain and not because I was generally depressed. But in saying all of this, if you've tried other things that haven't seemed to work then under the direction of your doctor, antidepressants might be your most helpful path.
    Diagnosed with SLE and Antiphospholipid Syndrom - June 2010

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