I guess the good news about your family is that they are taking your condition seriously. Some folks here have families who don't believe that they are sick. I'm sorry that this isn't the joyful time that it should be, but hopefully all that concern will translate into lots of pampering. Your new family here is cheering and you may become a roll model for others who have mild disease and want to start a family. I dare say quite a few of us had lupus when we were pregnant and didn't know it, and things turned out just fine.
Last edited by Gizmo; 06-27-2011 at 06:38 PM.
well everyone is starting to get excited. it will just take some time. the situation isnt great, but its okay.
Many congratulations to you!! I am glad to hear that your family is starting to get excited and I hope that you do too. Try not to stress about this as stress is not good for the pregnancy or the Lupus.
Do you have a rheumatologist? If so, make sure that (when you find an Obstetrician) your rheumy and you OB work very closely together. You are in good shape to be pregnant as your symptoms are mild and your are not taking medications at this time (although most medications for Lupus are safe for the pregnancy - there are only a few that are not recommended).
As you've been told, successful pregnancies with Lupus are more common than not. It is a rare occasion, these days, that pregnancies are not successful, especially in cases like yours.
We are all so very happy for you
Peace and Blessings
Look For The Good and Praise It!
My rheumy is sending me to an OB so that way I know they can keep in contact. my fist appointment is on the 13th of July. I wish it was sooner. I hate waiting! lol Keep you all posted, and of course, pictures will be posted so everyone can see. Its good to talk to everyone again. I missed you guys!
We're all willing to be online aunties, uncles and grannies. I have three grandchildren. My hubby likes to say that when it comes to grandkids, we don't get a choice, but we can sure choose to love and spoil them. Those three boys are very special to us!
Many hugs to you,
Just anted to let everyone know, that, I was at the ER last night, I Was spotting, and they did an ultrasound, my baby has no heart beat and they dont think that is going to change. I really want to thank you all for your support, and I'm just so lost. I feel as though, I shouldnt be here if my baby isnt here. Espeically because I feel as though its my fault, since I have lupus. I feel as though my baby never stood a chance
This does not mean that you can't have a baby. It also doesn't mean that you are not allowed to mourn. What you are not allowed to do is blame yourself for something you have no control over. The next few days are going to be very hard to deal with and my heart is breaking for you because I know what those days are like. I am going to PM you my email because I can get that even when away from the computer. I will be here whenever you need me. I am so very sorry for your loss and if you need to talk I am just one email away
it is not your fault.
Oh Vanna, I am so sorry. I can only imagine the pain you are feeling and wish that there were a way to make it better. Many women without lupus miscarry, so lupus may not be the "bad guy", although it does make it more likely to happen. If there were a way to prevent lupus, we'd all be out there beating drums and spreading the word - but there isn't. You are in no way responsible for your disease. In every account I have read by a woman who has lost a baby, the woman blames herself because she did something or didn't do something. Bad stuff happens and most of the time we don't know why.
Have you thought about talking with a counselor or psychologist to help you work through this? You sound like you really need support and a professional can give you a different perspective and ways to cope than your family can - especially since they are dealing with their own feelings about this loss. I will be thinking about you and really hope that you stay in touch. We stick together through good times and bad around here.
I'm so sorry. I can't even say how sorry I am - when I read that, my heart just dropped. The important thing that you need to realize though, is that is in no way your fault. Not even close to it! People carry babies to term even though they smoke and do drugs and drink alcohol... And it's not fair. At all. It shouldn't happen like this - the irresponsible and uncaring people should be the ones to go through that pain, not you. It's not your fault, not anywhere near it. It's just the way things happen sometimes... and ****... that's not helpful at all, is it? *sigh*. Why we here get the hard burdens when so many just skate by is so beyond me.
I wish there was something I could say that would help, but I know there isn't. Just please hang in there and take it one day at a time. Remember that it's NOT YOUR FAULT. Don't you EVER think that.
You DO deserve to be here - and you have so much more right to be than so many others. That may sound harsh, but it's true.
One day at a time, one breath at a time... you can get through this. My heart is heavy for you... but we are all here supporting you, all here for you.