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Thread: New guy here, the love of my life has Lupus

  1. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tanya's guy View Post
    I wish someone could talk her into moving in with me. That way she would have much less to do. I would do all the physical stuff that makes her uncomfortable. I love that woman more than any words could ever put together. It just breaks my heart to see her going thru this. What really hurts is if she did live with me then I know she would be doing much better. Kids kind of are getting the way of that right now so I just need patients.... Our day will come. I'm certain of it.... And when it does I will be there with open arms even if it's 20 years from today.
    Scott,

    All i can say mate on the situation of Tanya not moving in with you...is give her time she's going through alot now and she will need your help and support either sooner or later, mines progressed on me in the last 2yrs and i can't thank my hubby enough for the extra's he's taken on.

    Nobody can force her as you know and the old saying is...(it comes to those who wait) I know you want to help her so much but have you ever thought the independance of being in her own place is keeping Tanya fighting because we all cope with the disease in different ways.

  2. #32
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    Hello Tanya,

    You carry strong determination to carry on going which is great and you do have a man there who loves you dearly, as we all need love and support.
    Refering the plaquenil i'm on that, it's a none steriod drug and great for the skin and if you start the drug i suggest you take it at night as i was advised that off Linda on the site and it's worked better for me this time.
    Your dads abit simular to mine, my father would'nt except at ALL that i was ill, he left the lot to my mom. I'm like you can't even sit in the shade after 10mins my skins off and i could scrap myself silly.
    I know you've got family but besides your parent's love your man..my parents are dead and they did'nt know i had Lupus although i was born with it and inherited it off one of them, i have a sister in spain who's never been intouch in 6yrs since my mom passed away and i have a younger sister who lives over 5miles away and she never gets intouch and i know i should'nt say this but they're out of my mind now of existing because my young sister knows and never as the thought to come over or phone, so my love is for my hubby and my staff.

    Tanya please wear sun bloke and cover your skin as best you can because a flare can be so terrible to we.

    Hugzzzzzzzzz to you Tanya & so lovely to have you and scott with we.

    Love Terry xxxx
    Last edited by Peridot20_Gem; 06-24-2011 at 09:28 AM.

  3. #33
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    Hi All,

    Yes, I have a WONDERFUL man in Scott and I tell him everyday how lucky I am and I am not sure what it was I did in this life to deserve him. I will love him till I'm gone and look for him first in the next life. I cannot wait for the day I can live with him. My kids are 8th grade and 10th grade, not the oportune times to move them into new schools. Otherwise I would have been there already.

    Sunblock is a daily routine. I lather up every morning and I have realized I need big floppy hats (which I LOVE hats) and an umbrella. My windows are tinted and I am thinking I may need a shade or two darker in the fronts as the law really doesn't allow them to be tinted. However, if it takes a prescription from the doc I will do so.

    Today woke up with the "Headache". Then the nausea and the pain........so been taking it easy. Hope everyone is having an enjoyable day!

    Still waiting on my doc to email back about the Plaquenil.

    Talk to you all later!

  4. #34
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    Hello Tanya,

    Yes you do have a wonderful man there and the love and care he carried for you is outstanding and he so much wants to be involved with you and your life 150%...well i see where you coming from with your children because sometimes with kids it's an up evil and i hope he comes to understand this because as long as you keep to your meds like you have, you've got quite a few years ahead of you yet.

    Well at least your using your head with the sun and heat..i really hate it because i've just got no more enjoyment no more, winter does the extreme with my skin through the raynauds and come summer my rheumo as stopped me from going in the shade when it's hot as my skin reacts terrible with it and that's with bloke and being covered up, i can't type on my pc without wearing gloves (WHAT A WONDERFUL LIFE). LOL

    Oh the headaches are such a regular aspect with Lupus but they can really hurt and day in and out for me it's pain and i do get some nausea also but i do hope the email comes through for the plaquenil and if your skin ever as a flare ask for steriod cream to remove it and as soon as it's gone give your skin a break.

    You takecare mate.

    Hugzzzzz Terry xxx

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  6. #35
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    Tanya, as a mom it's nearly impossible to put yourself first - and moving your kids away from their friends probably feels like cruel and unusual punishment. We moved in 6th and 8th grades and I came out just fine, as did my siblings. In fact, we ended up in a much better situation. For one thing, my Dad had a job, so we had enough money for food and new clothes and spending money. Kids are more resilient than we give them credit for, and they probably want their mom to be as healthy as possible. It might actually be a load off of their minds to know that you have someone (besides them) taking care of you. Just a thought...

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  8. #36
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    i am a step father to 4 children, now all grown. and have 2 with my wife.

    talk to the kids............... they may want it now too, but not know how to approach it.

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  10. #37
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    Steve....your right in what you say the kids may be ok with it.

  11. #38
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    Hi Tanya, I can tell you are a wonderful mom and I admire that in any woman. My children have been through a lot with my divorce to their father and uprooting them. I have adult kids now. Some cope better than others, but to this day they say it was what was best. If your children knew how truly sick you were, I believe their love for you would carry them through the transition. Not that I am saying scare the crap out of them, but to say, I need an adult to walk with me as it is too hard. If they don't understand now, I believe they will once older.

    Only you know what is best Tanya. If it were me, I'd make that man marry me first (giggle).

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  13. #39
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    Hello Tanya,

    How are you feeling today and i do hope it's one where it's a little less pain free for you. xxx

  14. #40
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    Good Day My Friends,

    I am doing fairly good today. Sorry have been really busy the last few days and haven't been on my computer to respond. Rough day Friday though. However, it looks as though my PCP is going to come through with the Plaquenil. I also have been using my sunscreen as part of my daily aftershower routine, added a bottle to my purse and spf 30 lip gloss. Seems to help the car rides and Scott gave me a really GREAT umbrella today! I was able to groom 3 dogs yesterday, drive 4 hours and still get up today and make my radiation treatment and scans. 3 more treatments to go! Hope you all had a wonderful weekend!
    I will check in later this evening.
    Cheers!

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