Dealing with those who don't get it
I would love some insight...
Some people just don't understand hidden illnesses. Most of my friends and family try to understand and are quite supportive in helping me deal with my recently diagnosed Lupus. It is something I have lived with for years without a diagnosis, but those close to me have known my symptoms all this time and are wonderfully helpful.
My problem is with Husband. He ought to understand (his mother has Lupus) but alas, he chooses not to.
Let me say that I have become a master of hiding my symptoms from others. I wear makeup to cover the butterfly rash. I don't show that I am in pain. I don't complain about my symptoms. I pretend that I am just like everyone else much to my regret sometimes.
I have recently started sharing more with Husband (married 4 years) and he usually tells me I am "being a diva" or "its not that bad".
Well you know what? It IS that bad!
The other night, he wanted to do something and I told him I didn't want to-that I was too achy to do anything. He replied in a sarcastic tone "That's weird, you weren't sore a few minutes ago and now that I want to do something all of a sudden you're too achy." I told that I was achy before. He said that I hadn't mentioned it before.
I had reached my breaking point. I replied in a voice louder than necessary "I hurt ALL the time, every minute of every day! If I complained every time I was in pain, you wouldn't be with me right now!" He said nothing more on the subject.
Okay, so now that I'm reviewing my post I just sound whiny. I'm sorry, guys. I'm not normally like this. It's just something that's been bothering me for quite some time now and I just had to vent. Bottom line is that he does not understand and, I believe, chooses not to understand.
Have any of you been through this? That's probably a silly question....
How did you deal with it?
Anyway, thanks for enduring my rant. <<gentle hugs>>