I have not really posted on this site in quite some time... I have found myself very busy with life as of late. With all of the holidays and my wedding and honeymoon all thrown into the last few months things have been a bit out of control and I felt like I haven't been able to breathe. Much less reflect on how everything is going. I am incredibly happy to now be a wife, after 5 years of being the girlfriend it is a nice change of title. I have found myself struggling, however, with my self-worth
I haven't been on here too much recently. So much has been going on I haven't had time to think much less read all the daily posts on here. I've tried checking in but its alot sometimes.
Things... Are good. Sort of. Stressful. Tiring. My home is not my home anymore. My fiancÚ and I are packing to move somewhere in the next two weeks. We don't know where yet... But hopefully somewhere... I find myself sad about this chapter ending in our life.. This is our home. We've built a life
It is days like today that remind me over that I do have lupus. It is very much apart of my life now as everything else. A constant reminder that I do have to remind myself things arent how they use to be. I had a very long and hectic day. A hectic week. Today, after playing and watching a 2 year old for a few hours (which was the least taxing out of everything) I went to get my tires replaced on my car after discovering that they were in very bad shape. As I am sitting in the tire place waiting
Nothing seems to go as planned. Sometimes that is good, sometimes not so much. I find myself faced with this more and more as life goes forward. I'm still expected to function at a normal level even though my body doesn't always want to. I can't plan for the days I will feel good, I have to take it as it comes. Deal with the bad days as they come. I can't plan for them. I can't expect them, when I think I'll have a good day it isn't always the day i think it will be. I have been struggling with
Don't you ever wish you could just paused life? Just for s little bit, to catch up, to have the moments that you wish for. To just stop reality for a little while so it's not constantly shoved in your face making you think about it. I just want to have a moment when I'm not thinking about this or that every single day. I'm wishing for this moments more and more as the months go on. I just want a holiday from real for awhile. Just a moment to breathe. It seems like the time has just passed by the