Nonna

Tired of being tired for most of my life - Part One

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On a thread I said I would blog my history, mainly because it's so long. I'm 63, I'll be 64 in March. I can remember going to nightime high school football games well dressed against the cold and ending up crying because the cold made my foot hurt - very badly. At 12 my mother took me to another orthopedist because my knees were so bad, painwise and they would give out and i'd fall. Then my periods started. The pain was so bad, I couldn't eat without throwing up. My Mother would push me out the door to school every month. By third period I was in the nurses office - fourth periodmy Dad's lunch period ( yeah he taught at my high school, itsucked) he drove me home. Once I got my license he just tossed me the keys.

I was always tired, I did very badly in anything the least athletic. Gym class was my greatest fear.

Now for my headaches, when did they start, I remember going up to the third floor stairs and sitting on them because it was cool and quiet. Christmas eve in an Italian family back in the fifties was very very loud. More on my headaches later. I'm doing this as my life went. Just rememberthey also started as a small child.

My twenties, I got married, I had a miscarriage while on the pill. The doctor couldn't confirm it as I was away from home, we thought it was just an extremely painful start to my period. I was lucky enough to have 2 successful pregnancies which I spent in bed or on the couch. My daughters best childhood memory - painfully to me- is mom lying on the couch while she played with her toys and watched sesame street on the floor beside me. She was born in 72. I had to wait until she was old enough to care for herself for the next time. My son was born in 77 and that tiggerred things.

First to go was my thyroid, an internal goiter was choking me, I couldn't breathe. My blood sugar dropped to 25. The dieting and meds started. My weight spiraled out of control the fatigue got worse. I got divorced. Stress through the roof. My son was now 10. It's 1987.

The next ten years, where very hard. I had a teenager hormonal daughter with her fathers personality and a son with mine. My son and I communicated through my daughter. He would not talkextensively about his feelings with me.

My ibs was as always bad. My periods became almost constant. I had had 2 DnCs prior to the divorce, but this time; it was worse; the pain was bad. The first ultrasound showed a couple of crysts on my ovaries. The docs decided to redo in six weeks; by then they had exploded into multiple crysts. The tech thought it had to have been six months instead of weeks and double checked everything. Anyway to shorten this episode, I ended with a complete hystorectomy. The OB/GYN guy said it was amazing that I was able to have two kids. The pathologist said I was also lucky. It was precancerous. I would have ended with cancer had this not happened. That's another thought to go into, cancers relationship to AI diseases.

Now remember all this time I'm gaining weight due to no metabolism because the doc won't listen to me and raise my synthyroid dosage. My Ibs is getting worse now I eat lunch and throw up more often. Then one night ( oh my daughter is out of the house on her own thanks to her father pushing her tone on her own), my son was spending the night at a friends. I was in terrible pain even with my high pain tolerance. About two am, I ended up driving myself to the ER. I ended up with Major Gall Bladder surgery.
Next incident was minor, but looking back on it - very telling. I fell on the train platform while getting off the train. I practically destroyed my face. My forehead was scraped and badly bruised, my nose was broke and my upper lip was cut open. I was a mess. They took me to the ER in a major city. I sat there and bled all over the place be ause I wasn't throwing up or having a heart attack. Oh I forgot I was Ina wheel chair because I'd also wracked up my k ees.

To be continued.........
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