by, 05-06-2009 at 06:26 PM (443 Views)
Wow. Today is bad, really bad. Keith, my boyfriend, is downstairs with his buddies playing poker, (it's our turn to host). I guess I should back up and start from the beginning. I woke up this morning dead tired. I then went to school and have been very lethargic all day. One of my classmates asked me if I had bruises under my eyes because that's how bad I looked. After lunch I started getting a really bad headache and my body started aching all over. We got out of class at 5 and I came home and cleaned up the house a little and made food for the guys. I sat down for like five minutes and had to come upstairs to lay down. I can't stand for but a few seconds without getting light headed and dizzy and foggy. THIS FREAKING SUCKS. I want to be down there being a good host and do the typical beer run or whatever. These are my friends too and I would love to socialize with them but I just physically can't. I HATE that I have to limit myself. I used to be so active and bubbly, now I can barely stand to get out of bed at some times. I just want to cry. I'm so depressed and I feel so lonely, though I'm physically not alone. I just wish I could dump freaking Lupus.