I'm listening and I know what you mean. I can't seem to find myself at the moment. But you sure seem to be on the right path. You may feel that Lupus has you down. But atleast you have a name for it. When I was your age, they called you a hypochondriac and said get over it. It's in your head. People are better off with Lupus today than they were 20, 30, 40 years ago. Live as best you can and don't worry. As for the man in the library, maybe next time you could say to him- I have Lupus, what's your problem/disease? LOL, a little sarcasm (not sure about spelling), never hurts. Maybe that's just me at my age. But you see we are all trying to find the right way to cope.
Hugs and good thoughts