serand4

  1. So much better right now

    I can't believe how black and white some of these lupus days are. You can be in the pit of dispair and pain one day and then wake up and feel like hitting the mall. Okay, the mall part is really rare, but it does happen. A couple of nights ago I made a decision to start going to bed at a very specific time (earlier) and then when I wake up, focus on that day and that day only. The AA approach of one day at a time, one minute at a time when necessary. Grant it, it is only day two but both have ...
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  2. Too long but needed to vent

    Wow, it has been such a hard month! I don't know if it's winter and the cold or if my body is cycling for another huge flare. I have been in so much pain!! And, of course, there's the swelling around the joints and my eyes. I've known without a doubt that I have Lupus for months but if there was any doubt, it's completely gone. The Reynauds and the Sjourns just nag. I know I sound like a constant downer but this is pretty much the only place I let it all out. I hate all the medication and ...
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  3. Simple Pet Peeves

    With this disease being so unique in how it affects people, I'm just going to take a moment and complain about my own personal pet peeves. I doubt this will be too interesting to most of you so I will not be the least bit offended if you check out now : ). But my biggest problem is my lungs. Things aren't as bad as they were, say, three months ago, but I run out of air pretty quickly -- especially during a conversation. In fact, I often can't finish a simple sentence. It's kind of like the ...
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  4. Mixed blessings

    I had the first really,really good day in probably five months and I'm almost afraid to go to bed tonight for fear tomorrow will put me back where I was. It was amazing! I was able to clean the house, grocery shop, get my son his favorite take-out meal and even do some laundry. I know we're not supposed to overdo but I have a feeling that we all do it anyway. After all, how many times have we gone a week without vacuuming or doing laundry simply because we can't. My nightmare is when we run ...
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  5. I refuse to let Lupus own my memories!

    Today I was out and about, actually feeling pretty good. I hate being as weak as I am these days but I felt inspired to dust off the treadmill and start working out tomorrow. I love to work out and I love to be strong. Undoubtedly I'll be sick again before I can get very far but it might be worth a start.

    I started thinking, "I don't want this part of my life to be my "loudest" memories." I have to say, a lot of life-changing things have taken place in a very ...
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