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serand4
12-29-2010, 06:56 PM
I can tell that I'm spiraling into a very deep depression. I've never been so tired or so confused about what I'm supposed to do next. I have at least four consistent doctors and over ten medications. My greatest desire is to sleep but I know I have responsibilities in order to keep my home and keep the utilities turned on. I think tomorrow I will call my primary care doc and see if there's an outpatient program to try and get my stuff pulled together. I would love to do in patient where I don't have any choice but do what these people tell me to do but I can't run out on my son and I have pets that need care too.

Has anyone tried this? Has there been anyone who's tried therapy with any success? I just feel like I'm crawling up a wall that's been greased with butter. I've got to try something different. I've never felt the way I do right now and it's a very bad feeling. This is not how I want my son to remember me or my parents. They've worked so hard to be supportive and I'm too tired and disinterested to give it my all.

Anyway, I would love to have input from my peers. You guys know what works and what doesn't so please share.

Thank you - I truly mean that.

Linda From Australia
12-29-2010, 07:47 PM
Though I feel sad that you feel so low, I am glad that you are taking some action. If you do nothing, that is what your family will remember, you being sick and doing what they will perceive is nothing about it.

Try to use the chat feature at times just to say hi. Please let us know what happens when you see your doctor.

tgal
12-29-2010, 08:02 PM
Linda said it perfectly so there is not much to add. I do want you to know that I am here if you need me. If you can not get beyond the down times on your own then I agree that it is time to take another step. There is no right or wrong in how we deal with this. There is only the best that we can do. As Linda stated you want your family to know that you tried so looking into this step may be exactly what you need to do.

There are several of us that try to hang around chat off and on throughout the day. It may take 10 min. or so for us to check back but if we are close we will check back in. Come talk. It really does help.

rob
12-30-2010, 02:00 AM
Hi Serand4,

I've been following your blog, and it's not hard to see that you are feeling totally overwhelmed right now. I sure can understand that. If you think you need to seek out help in the form of therapy, then you should trust your instincts, and go with it. There is absolutely no shame in seeking this sort of help. I have sought help this way myself more than a few times over the years, and it did make a difference. It made a huge difference as a matter of fact. I had to hit my absolute rock bottom before I sought help. I wish would have sought help before that point. The fact that you are accepting that you need help well before you reach that point is a very good thing. It's also a brave thing, as it's not an easy thing to do.

Therapy definitely made a difference for me, and I think it would for you too.

Rob

froggal
12-30-2010, 09:36 AM
Please know that you are in my prayers and I think that its wonderful that you have admitted that you know you need help. I have also been to therapy and it has saved my life! We are here for you whenever you need us. God bless you!

Hunniebun
12-30-2010, 09:15 PM
I have been in therapy now for about a year and I am also on anti depressants, and I find the combination has been wonderful for me. I had a really bad childhood and lifelong abuse from my mother as well as dealing with the RA and Lupus stuff, so I definitely recommend therapy, you have nothing to lose trying it.

Saysusie
01-02-2011, 12:58 PM
I am an AVID advocate for therapy in conjunction with our physical health care. You cannot heal one without the other! I, personally, was in intensive therapy for 3yrs, I then moved to maintenance therapy (once per week) and now I continue my therapy, but only once per month and/or when needed. Therapy is something that I WILL NOT discontinue..this disease takes an immeasurable toll on us..both on our bodies and in our minds. So, I believe that it is imperative that we diligently treat both aspects of the disease in order to help us to maintain some form of reasonable life with this disease!
I am so happy to hear that you are going to take steps to do both. Please know that we are all here to support you, comfort you, and let you know that you are not alone.

Peace and Blessings
Namaste
Saysusie

harper
01-02-2011, 03:57 PM
I am a registered psychotherapist and can assure you that with 'the right fit', amazing transformations do happen in people's lives. I've seen it many times and it still gives me shivers when clients make a breakthrough.

I have seen counsellors myself and can tell you that the most important aspect (and research verifies this) is the quality of relationship you have with your therapist. I always tell my clients that if for any reason they don't feel that we are a good fit, I will have no hesitation to refer them to other qualified therapists. If you have any reservations by your 3rd or 4th session, it is probably time to find someone new.

That said, if therapy is successful, it often means looking into places that are difficult and painful. I remember crying non-stop through about six sessions with a grief counsellor. Just know that it does get better, and to give yourself a lot of space and time to regroup after a session. Don't go for therapy and then off to work, you may be exhausted beyond belief as you begin to explore yourself.

There are lots of different types of therapy styles: psycho-analysis (long term), solution focused (short term), narrative therapy (several different types), Cognitive Behavioural Therapy or CBT which is less insight oriented, but often successful for people dealing with depression, and many more!

Whatever style you decide on, you should always articulate your goals for going into therapy early on. You will need a road map to follow if you get off course along the way.

If you need any further information, I am happy to answer any questions. I have been deep in depression before and I understand how debilitating it can feel.

serand4
01-11-2011, 10:31 PM
This is a late reply - holidays and such. I still plan to find a therapist. I had a wonderful one years ago and I sincerely pray she's still practicing. She was direct but humerous and I always felt she was on my side. That's a nice feeling these days! I'm a bit better after the holidays but I need the therapy. Who knows, maybe I'll get my disability and one of the two therapists I had to see will step up! There's just been too much in too short of a period of time and I know we all experience this on occasion but it's a matter of how we handle it. So far I'm keeping it pretty well hidden, but I don't want to sudden be angry all the time or isolate. My mom was like that (she is bipolar) and that messes with a child's head.

Anway, thank you all so much for caring and responding. We really need to have each other to lean on!