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ritzbit
09-20-2010, 04:28 PM
I'm trying REALLY hard not to get stressed out. But its really hard not to be with my class load, college, and feeling like crap. I've been so bad about my medicine and its not intentional. I am either so busy or so tired that I forget and I dont mean to and Im starting to feel like crap. I need help in coming up with a way to remember my medicine. I do not want to feel this way. I can barely make it through the school day then go home and sleep and get absolutely nothing done. Im afraid of how the Lupus Walk will go this weekend. My family wont go with me, which is kind of upsetting, and Im having problems with my boyfriend who I've been with for a year. I just feel sick and alone lately =(

pandagirl
09-20-2010, 06:59 PM
Like I tell my daughter(23 yrs old & a Lupie) who is burning the candle at both ends as well..try to eat well..leave yourself a note/alarm on cell phone for med time. Maybe even by your bed if it's meds you can take at bed time. Rest when ever possible. Try to keep a routine of sorts if you can. Are you really up for the Lupus walk??? I know you have good intention, but you have a lot going on right now. As far as the boyfriend..talk it out. If you can't work it out...NEXT! That was my motherly speech...sorry..hang in there. take care of yourself.

Islablue
09-20-2010, 08:02 PM
I know what you mean. I was just like you. Trying to live like someone who doesn't have lupus. But when I lived like I didn't have anything wrong with me, the lupus took control and reminded me that it was still there. Stress makes it worse so you need to take a couple days to just veg out on the couch and relax. If your boyfriend cant support you in this then he doesn't deserve you. No excuses. My husband is amazing and has never once made me feel like I was an inconvenience to him. (We fight like any other couple, but just never about me being sick) You have yourself to take care of and everyone else be damned. I keep medicine on me and some at home. In my purse at least when I remember that I've forgotten it I can quickly take it. U know? You wouldn't leave the house without brushing your teeth (hopefully hehe) so put it by that with a cup to put some water in and swallow those bad boys down :) GOOD Luck, I'd like to tell you it gets easier, but it's hard to juggle life and lupus. We have to be on top of our health at all times. Very inconvenient.

Hillbillie
09-20-2010, 08:06 PM
Ritzbit
I had a hard time remembering if I took my meds or not until I went to the dollar tree and bought a medicine box. The kind of box that has a compartment for every day. Now I load up the box and then when I take the pills I leave the flap up. That way Sunday night if I can't remember if I had taken my meds I can go look at the box. I used to associate those boxes with old old people but I have found they are a great help to anyone that can't remember their meds. This is especially good for those foggy day when I don't remember my name! Hope this helps. Take care, There is only one of you! Billie

ritzbit
09-22-2010, 02:24 PM
Thanks for the advice. Im feeling more and more like crap. Not the best way to start off the school year. Im so crabby all the time. I feel all outta wack. I seriously cant pay attention to anything anymore. And I keep noticing it while Im driving. I started to run off the road the other day. I cant just not drive though! I drive myself to and from school. And I found out today that no one is going on the Walk with me, which is kind of upsetting. I dont even know if Im going to go now, and I was looking forward to it.

SandyR
09-23-2010, 06:42 AM
Ritz,

You are under a lot of stress right now with a new school year beginning and what with your family letting you down and relationship issues on top of it all. It's now wonder you aren't feeling well! You have a disease that THRIVES on stress - eats it up and grows bigger and stronger with the more you feed it and that only hurts you. You have to find some way to better manage this stress and eliminate the unnecessary stress.
I know you really want to do the walk and how important it is - really I do - I have a Walk MS team and there have been years I have had to do it alone and be disappointed by lack of family participation. I also know that you can usually be a "Virtual Walker" at alot of these events. Let's face it, the money you raised for research and awareness will go alot further than the steps you physically take on the walk that will only hurt you more than you already are feeling. There's nothing wrong with sitting this year out - YOU are one of the reasons for this walk and everyone would understand.
As for your bf - I hope things are better but if they aren't then I agree with Andrea. Trust me - you can't change a person and someone won't change for you just because they love you. They have to change for themself. You and your health are more important than anything else so remember that and keep them your priority.
You have to get those meds under control. I am the same as you with meds - hate to take them, constantly forget them - and one thing that works well for me is to set a weekly alarm to fill a pill box for the whole week. Keep it somewhere you have to touch and see it and move it every day like on the toothpaste or on your alarm clock or on your cell phone while you sleep. It helps to remember. Hopefully getting your meds settled will get your body the energy and focus you need right now because that whole driving off the road thing is scarey as hell! Thank God you are all right! If that happens again, do you have any backup plans to get to school? Bus, train, etc?

ritzbit
09-23-2010, 02:50 PM
Thanks Sandy! I know I need to stop worrying about things so much and I try to keep telling myself that most of what Im worrying about doenst even matter anyway. And its not like I dont care about school, because I really really do. But Im going to be applying places soon. And they will only be looking at my grades up until last year. Sooo Im trying to put that on the back burner for the time being because Im worrying sooo much about it. Im trying to just spend some time with old friends I havent seen in awhile so that I dont have to deal with my family or bf right now. They are just frustrating me way more than I can handle at the moment. I plan to find my old pill box. I had one last year that got lost while cleaning (that makes a lot of sense right?).

Islablue
09-23-2010, 10:39 PM
I'm sorry that no one is going to do the walk with you. That's pretty dang sorry of them. I hate to say it, but I've found that's how a lot of people are. You find out who your TRUE friends are when you get sick. I doubt that many people would do the walk with me either. My "old friend" has really let me down lately. She never asks about my condition and she downplays anything that I might be going through in regards to it. She used to be so supportive, but she's pregnant and almost due. It seems like it's made her so self centered. Like I owe her something.. I don't know how to describe it. We have been friends since we were little and BEST friends for over 12 years, but now she's like a stranger to me. I know it sucks that your bf and family are letting you down. Hopefully you aren't like me and you don't blame it on something you may have done. I always give in to the thoughts of .. "Maybe she's tired of talking to me about my illness" or "I should've gone to this or that even though I was sick" Ugh, it makes me confused just telling you all of it. haha.
About the pill box.. I am not very good at that pill box. I have one for 7 days of the week and my pills are too big for it. I just keep all my vitamins that I have to take in a small shoebox out in my kitchen and then the other medicine gets taken gradually. I need to get better about that too, so don't feel bad! I am not good at remembering the ones that are long acting because you don't see results right away. I'm going to dig out my pill box too and fill it up. I hope things are getting better for you. My heart goes out to you for your determination. ((hugs))

SandyR
09-24-2010, 07:21 AM
Thanks Sandy! I know I need to stop worrying about things so much and I try to keep telling myself that most of what Im worrying about doenst even matter anyway. And its not like I dont care about school, because I really really do. But Im going to be applying places soon. And they will only be looking at my grades up until last year. Sooo Im trying to put that on the back burner for the time being because Im worrying sooo much about it. Im trying to just spend some time with old friends I havent seen in awhile so that I dont have to deal with my family or bf right now. They are just frustrating me way more than I can handle at the moment. I plan to find my old pill box. I had one last year that got lost while cleaning (that makes a lot of sense right?).

Good grades are important, but stressing over future possible job losses by missing a question or going down a letter grade is not helpful or practical. There are lots of people who are employed who didn't do as well as you in school and who aren't even educated. For the most part, employers are more interested in that desire to perform well and not disappoint yourself and in how your personality will blend well with their organization than in the number on your transcript. Even in the teaching field. I'm not saying grades don't matter - they do, but you have to focus on this year and not the intangible might be's in the years ahead. One step at a time.
I understand losing things when you clean. I have a habit of tossing things in the passion of cleaning and later looking for it. Usually it's no big deal but in cases like this I would say just go buy a new one for the $5 or so dollars it'll cost and give yourself peace of mind now.
I think it's great you are spending time with your old friends. I'm sure they have missed you as well and it's good that you have them on your support team.

gina
09-24-2010, 11:00 AM
set the alarm on your cell phone thats what i use to do. hope you feel better soon. and when you do take advatage of it and when you don't sit your butt down and relax. everything going on will still be going on so don't worrry about it. what can wait will wait.

scubagramplit
09-24-2010, 03:28 PM
Ritz, sorry things are not going well right now, trust me I can relate, some of my meds are taken twice daily and when I was working at the school I relied on my cell phone which has an alarm setting on it that I used to remind me and those pill boxes that have the am & pm are priceless. Fill it up for the week and do what we lupies do best, forget about it, untill it is time to take meds then remember where you put it:) Hope things get better.

ritzbit
09-25-2010, 09:16 AM
Thanks for the advice everyone. I hope to get around to doing a bunch of things "me" related today like organizing my pills and such. Im really freaking bummed that Im not at the Walk. It was today. I really wanted to go. The only person who was going to go was my friend Jennifer who I've been hanging out with a lot more lately. She's been pretty great. I didnt want to just drag her down there though cuz I knew after a little while I'd have trouble with walking so much. Which was why I was bringing a guy. But my "best friend" and boyfriend decided not to go. So today is going to turn into a catch-up-on-college day since I feel behind in the whole early admissions process. Wish me luck.

jmail
09-27-2010, 11:25 PM
Sorry you didn't get to do the walk, Ritzbit. I've been dealing with multiple issues lately, and ended up with pneumonia again, and haven't gone anywhere for the last week. Wishing you luck, for a great school year, and everything else.

babysister66
10-05-2010, 09:27 PM
I know I am 44, but I started college at 40 to get my BSN degree. I started my senior year last month, and the stress immediately had me down with pneumonia. Then when I was real down, pneumonia, docs thining I had cancer, my nursing director called me into her office and basically said get better or get out. My being sick was making the patients and the other students nervous. Excuse me? I was so upset, scared, and stressed anyways, and then to be told this. I have always maintained the highest grades, scholorships, etc etc, and then to do this to me was horrible. Well, I did end up getting diagnoses through it all, but now the school directors watch me like a hawk. It is horrible. I have to try not to act sick and take care of everything 110%. I do know how you feel. Hang in there hun