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AyahsClan
04-29-2009, 11:30 AM
I just found out, at 49, I have lived my whole life with ADHD (attention deficient hyperactive disorder) and just now found out. I have mixed feelings. It is not as serious to deal with medically, in fact I am not even going to. It is a relief to finally understand why I do the things I do. Why living with chronic illness has been so incredibly torturous because I am unable to rest and be still while doing it.

Recently I have been doing research on body language, something I have studied for decades. The new show "Lie to Me" stimulated renewed interest to learn more. I realized that I have constant body language; fidgeting, playing with my ring, combing through my hair, toe - leg anything that can move tapping. I am in a constant state of impatience. I am constantly waiting. It is like sitting in the doctors office for your name to be called, waiting for the nurse to open the door and call your name. I have that feeling every minute I am awake. It got so bad I recently agreed to take the vallium I was prescribed.

People always say to me "you just need a new hobby" to keep busy. I grow things, my living room is a jungle. I can check them for water needs, re-pot them (all in the house usually sitting when I am too weak to stand) but knitting, crochet, art projects, forget it. It is NOT going to happen. Now I know why.

I have never been an indoor person my entire life, ever. Indoors, while raising kids, was for sleeping, eating and survival, we spent as much time as possible, out. Nature walks were weekly unless I was too sick, having surgery etc. Then the torture of waiting began.

My youngest son was diagnosed with a severe case of ADHD by a team of some of the best pediatricians in the US at Loma Linda Medical U. They spent hours with him before giving him the diagnoses. Several times doctors asked me if I had it, I'd always say no. I never knew, until now. Howie Mandel has been supporting a new effort to help us and I went to this website; www.adultadhdisreal.com and took the screening tests. It all falls in to place for me now.

I really don't know what will change but at least now I know I am not crazy. I now know my "eccentricities" are not just really being a social misfit. My inabilities to finish projects is not due to a personality flaw. My inability to rest and chill are normal for me.

At least with this knowledge hopefully I can find new ways to cope to ease the torturous impatient feelings. Anybody else have ADHD?

DrinkofWtr
05-01-2009, 08:05 AM
I don't have ADHD, but I had a boyfriend who had it and it is hard on those who don't have it. He seemed to always be running around in circles and never really accomplishing anything.

mountaindreamer
05-01-2009, 10:12 AM
hi ayah,

my middle daughter was diagnosed with adhd when she was 7 years old. i spent the rest of her school days trying to work with teachers....they all said "her behavior is typical of little boys but not little girls". she struggled for years learning how to cope with the symptoms, and now does an excellent job...but she continues to deal with it.

i have never been diagnosed, but there is probable cause to wonder if i have adhd....i don't want to know, cause i don't want to deal with any thing else.

adl011
05-01-2009, 10:53 AM
I've always kinda suspected that I have ADHD, but because of all my other health issues, I didn't really want to know. I was recently diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder with extreme manic episodes, and I just contribute the restlessness, fidgeting, racing thoughts, impatience, inability to start/finish tasks...etc, to the Mania, but the dr did mention that I could have ADHD as well. He didn't actually diagnose me with it though. I was on medicine for it for a while, but I simply cannot afford it with all the other medicines, and the lupus/fibro/epilepsy is a little more urgent.

I'm glad that you finally have an answer and that you know you aren't crazy. Have a great day!

~Amanda

wrightrs
05-01-2009, 11:23 AM
This is something I have wonder about for several years. When I was younger they just called it hyper-active. When I was in College taking Early Childhood. Was when I first it called ADHD. Looking back at my childhood I wondered if I had it. But I don't know. Now I just blame everything on lupus Fog. I doubt I will ever try and find out.

AyahsClan
05-03-2009, 10:17 AM
Thanks for the input I kinda lost this thread. lol... Lupus fog + ADHD, Hey it's not all bad! The two balance themselves out a bit.

Finding out has actually been a good thing for me. I have no desire to act on it anymore than to answer my doctors question with "yes I think I do!," and learn new ways to live calmer. We have a third generation with it, two grand daughters. Oh Lordy they are handfuls and remind of my ADHD son completely. It was very hard raising him! OMGoooooooooooooooosh it was all I had in me.

Before he turned 3 I wanted to try to go back to work and had prepped my husband to watch him for the first time. He had my oldest 9 year old daughter to help a little. He started his watch and I took my shower (I could only take fast showers when son was asleep). As I was getting dressed the house was way too quiet. By the time I am quickly dressed and out I am looking for people.

What I find is my husband up on the ROOF OF THE HOUSE handing my little son down to my daughter. My son had crawled up on a chair, up on a fence, up on the patio cover to the roof of the house running amuck.

I was different from all the other children growing up. I was always going somewhere. We didn't have a family life so I had a lot of early latchkey freedom. As far back as I can remember I would ask my mom if I could "go down the street" to visit my friend. I am sure she had no idea that I was always all over the place. I had so many colorful, unusual, dangerous life experiences at a young age. I was about 7 running around collecting bottles to take to redeem to buy candy.

In grade school it was total freedom. By 10 I was walking miles to horse ranches trading mucking stalls for the chance to ride and groom a horse. They always let me ride the ones that in horse language we call "needs some miles" which means; learn to hold on. I had more than a few broken bones and concussions. I'd always try to hide them from my mother. She would get mad.

Once I broke and dislocated my shoulder on a fall. I walked home, acted like everything was ok when she got home from work. I had a hard time moving and she asked what was wrong. I said "nothing" I'm fine. The next day upon inspection she hollared at me "THERE IS A HUGE HOLE IN YOUR SHOULDER! You have to go to the hospital!"

So this was not normal behavior? LOL....Now that I get it I am actually doing better. I have been wanting to sell things on ebay but just could not stay organized in my head. Well, now I am learning different methods and am getting things started.

There are things that help me cope so now that I get it i am going to start to collect more. For example I love silver puzzle rings. I can fidget with them, take them apart, put them back together and they never get lost cause I never take them off. There are also spinner rings.

cptnblah
05-10-2009, 10:08 AM
I was dx with ADHD a few years back. I was on a lot of meds then (they were giving me uppers in the morning and downers at nite to sleep - yoyo). The funny thing was...I was able to cope with it when I got rid of my 1st wife!!! She made it all worse with all of her psycho-drama. (I just had to edit this cause I just figured out how to do the faces by accident!!!)

;)

AyahsClan
05-10-2009, 11:56 AM
I was dx with ADHD a few years back. I was on a lot of meds then (they were giving me uppers in the morning and downers at nite to sleep - yoyo). The funny thing was...I was able to cope with it when I got rid of my 1st wife!!! She made it all worse with all of her psycho-drama. (I just had to edit this cause I just figured out how to do the faces by accident!!!)

;)

Drama..oh I know what you mean. I have zero tolerance for it. I stayed single for years because relationships could get so dramatic. When I finally did remarry bout 5 years ago we had to deal with it. Hubby tells people he has "matured" more in the years he has been with me than the first 41 years of his life. It's my way or the hyway when it comes to drama. Without peace my life sucks! Between lupus, fibro, HH and taking care of my mother there is no room for unnecessary suffering..lol

froggal
05-11-2009, 10:38 AM
I am just now at 35 beginning to believe that I have ADHD. My mother was told I had it around the age of 10. I think that I have learned to deal with it more as I get older. I do get less impatient with age. Does ADHD have anything to do with temper problems?

wrightrs
05-11-2009, 11:01 AM
Sometime I wonder if I have ADHD and OCD !!! My live is pretty crazy. Always jumping from one thing to another. Always cleaning something and never finishing.