View Full Version : New to site: Depressed beyond belief

05-02-2005, 02:12 PM
:cry: I'm glad I found this site. Just knowing all of you know what I'm going through makes me feel a little better. I never talked with anyone who had my initial symptoms. I was diagnosed in 98 after I experienced months of hives, itching, and swelling of my face. In 2003, I was also diagnosed with Schlerdoma. Since then I've been in a deep depression and can't find my way out. I'm 25, single, and no children. Even though I have a great family and wonderful friends I feel completely alone. I feel like the devil (the diseases) has taken my life away. Many days I can turn to the Lord and find the strength to make it through the day, but today is not one of them. Even though I want and deserve a loving boyfriend I just don't believe anyone will be able to deal with the up's and down's of my life. To top everything off I have to go for test to determine if I'm going through early menopause because of the Cytoxan. My life is a mess. At this very moment I've cried so much I given myself a headache and I'm ready to give up on life period. Does anyone have any encouraging words to get me through this very difficult period in my life.

05-02-2005, 05:05 PM
O Lil {{{HUG}}} I am so sorry you are going through this. Does your dr know how depressed you are? If not, please call them and tell them. Dealing with the various symptoms we face is NOT easy and would give anyone the right to be depressed. But there is help for it. I'm here to listen if you want to talk. Just email me k?
You are right, you do deserve a loving boyfriend/significant other. My dh is wonderful but sometimes exhausts me trying to get him to understand this thing that lives with me. I was lucky that I have one child then had to have a full hysterectomy and went into what is called surgical menopause. NOT fun!!! So I do understand the symptoms (btw I'm 30). I really hope you'll call your dr and talk to them. They have some wonderful meds and methods to get you through this.

05-03-2005, 10:26 PM
Hi Lil, I'm so sorry you are feeling so down. :mad: It just isn't fair :!: :!:
Please talk with your doctors. We all get feeling very down :cry: But in my experience the fog lifts and we do have times when we feel better. I will think good thoughts for you and I hope you feel better real soon. Please email or keep writing. take care, s 8)

05-10-2005, 11:36 AM
Hi Lil;
I empathize with you and I want you to know that most of us have gone through the depression. The problem of depression is particularly relevant to us lupus patients. But, consider this, your depression can be a symptom of the lupus itself and a result of your anxiety. What you are going through now happens to at least 60% of us lupus patients. As in your case, the depression often occurs early in the course of the illness, sometimes even predating the diagnosis of lupus by as much as a year.
The good news is that, if your depression is, in fact, a direct result of your lupus, it will usually respond to treatment of the lupus itself (e.g. with steroids).
I always say that it is just as important for us to take care of our emotional health when we are dealing with this illness. Therefore, please talk to your doctors about providing you with counseling and/or therapy so that you can work your way through the ups and downs of this illness. It is important that your doctors treat your emotional state as seriously as your physical state.
Please know that we are here for you and, as I always say, You are in no way alone in this!!
Peace and Blessings

05-16-2005, 10:22 PM

I am sorry you are depress, I know how you feel i am going thru the same thing. Its hard to deal with aving lupus your whole life changes. We have to hang in there and remember what You said The Lord don't give us more than we can bare.

I have just been told about 3 months ago , its been very hard on me and my family. they have been very supportive but i have been on a emotional roller coaster. I have learned to turn to other people who is going thru the same thing as i am for comfort , I am so glad i have found this site. I hope you wil turn to this new family you have found like i have for the comfort that you need, i have. i will look out for your post in the future. take care hope things work out for you.

06-13-2005, 10:04 AM
Oh Lil, please hang in there. It's gotta be hard with no support system - but you and I both have found this wonderful site where people understand just what we are going thru. And remember, this disease can be turned into an offering to God; or it can be used by Satan to take you away from God. :evil: Every single day when I drop a million things and have to clean up the messes, I think "What's going on here God???" Now I have started to chuckle and just clean it up. We have so many weird things that happen to us, it starts to be a joke. Chin up my friend, there are so many people here wanting to help you.

06-13-2005, 11:05 AM
Hi Lil-
Im here for you I completly understand the whole drepression situation in finding out I had this disease and it was VERY hard for my family and friends to try to support me when they didnt even know what exactually was going on. These emotions we feel are normal but sometimes some people need some assistance for getting back on the right POSITIVE attiitude track. If you need someone to talk to feel free..I have just about anything to get ahold of me.

07-05-2005, 01:19 PM
hi lil

i know exactly how u feel. i just lost my marriage; partly due to my physical limitations. i so down. i can't work, can't go out and mingle. even though i want a relationship, i feel that no one is really gonna wanna deal with this and at the same time i sometimes feel i don't want to subject anyone to this.

but i have to stop and look at people who've lost limbs or areconfined in wheelchairs, they aren't alone so why should i be. remember "for every crooked pot there's a crooked lid".

yes it's difficult. you're envious of everyone else. you ask y u? what have i done? i'm trying to believe that it'll past at least enough to be managable. try to have faith.

hopefully somewhere on this board will find some comfort.

keep your head up

07-06-2005, 01:37 AM
Hi 'lil, are you still out there with us?

As the others have said, it is a difficult thing we deal with many times. Saysusie reminded us that our depression often becomes better as our lupus is treated.

I also want to remind you that depression can be an illness = it is NOT "all in your head," it is a physical and chemical condition in our bodies. It can be treated. For some of us, medications help. For others, a good counselor who is used to dealing with chronic conditions such as ours. For some, BOTH! But living with a chronic condition does not have to mean depression - life can be joyful in spite of limitations.

Please talk to your doc about your feelings and depression, if you haven't already. And please let us know how you're doing!

many hugs, dear...