View Full Version : sad way to start new year

01-01-2009, 04:54 PM
I just found out that my aunt (like second mom) has colon cancer. She is probably going to have emergency surgery on friday. She's only 40 yrs old but has been having pain for a few months. I really need support and prayers right now. I'm worried about this stress bringing on a flare. I'm not sure what to do. We have always been so close that my mom is actually jealuos of the relationship. My aunt doesn't want anyone to know because they will prob talk bad about it. I want to go see her when she's at the hospital but I have bronchitis and think I should keep my distance. I don't want her to catch this. I'm already on prednisone so dr said I shouldn't even be coughing. I'm prob going to have to up my dose. Is it a good idea that I don't go to hosp? I'm really lost right now. I know she has to have the surgery before they can even tell what stage it is. I have already lost a few loved ones. I'm 28 yrs old and the hardest was my younger brother 2 yrs ago. I'm still not over that and crying just thinking about it. I'm not ready to lose someone else. Please pray...

01-01-2009, 05:05 PM
Gentle hugs to ya karli

I'll keep you and your loved ones in my prayers. It's been a tough year for me as well.

I lost my favorit aunt 2 months ago. Now her husband (my favorit Uncle) is in the hospital.

He's pretty much given up since he lost his wife. It's breaking my heart.

I understand the difficult choice you are facing. If you are contagious then you could wear a face mask if it's too hard not to go.

My cousins were keeping the family away from the hospital when my aunt was not well.

I HAD to see her. The only reason they didn't want people going is because her memory was gone.

I snuck in to see her any way. She was a lovely lady. Even if she didn't really know who she was anymore, she stayed true to her heart. She was sweet and kind as always.

I'm very glad that I got the chance to visit here one last time.

I lost my mom when I was 27, my aunt has always been there for me and lived just down the street, so to have her suddenly cut out of my life was very hard to take.

Do what's in your heart to do and be at peace with that.

01-01-2009, 05:11 PM
Thanks I didn't even think of wearing a mask. I will do that. I'm not really thinking straight right now so am really grateful for the help. Hope ur uncle gets better soon. I've watched loved ones just give up. It is so hard to go through I will add u to my prayers also. God doesn't give us more than we can handle right? Seems so hard some days.

01-01-2009, 05:23 PM
Hi Karli,
I am sorry to hear about your Aunt. It is so hard when our loved ones get sick and it is rough to handle it big time. I just lost my sister-in-law earlier this month and it is rough to deal with it. I will keep you and your Aunt in my prayers. I hope that all goes well with her.


Pretti in Pink
01-01-2009, 05:40 PM
You and your aunt are in my prayers.

01-01-2009, 06:42 PM
Hi karli,

I will include you and your aunt in my prayers. I just spent the last three days with a 29 year old young lady that my daughter and I met while battling my dauther's breast cancer. This young lady has since been batling colon and liver cancer (her younger brother is seriously ill with same cancers). and they both are loosing the struggle. We just put her on a plane for her last trip home to Michigan to be with her brother and mother. Such a tragic story....loss is so difficult, leaves a real void spot in the heart.

Prayers to you and your family,

01-01-2009, 08:37 PM
Thanks everyone. I'm hoping that it hasn't spread to other organs but won't know until after the surgery. I can't tell my mom yet and she keeps calling and she can tell I've been crying. I told her its just my cold. I hate lying but have to honor my aunts requests.

I can barely handle one person in my family with cancer. It seems impossible to bare having 2 people with it esp siblings. How is their mother doing?

How is your daughter? How are you coping with it? Did the stress cause any flares? Hope u didn't have any flares.

01-02-2009, 01:28 AM
Oh Karli, I am so sorry you are going through this :cry: You and your family are in my throughts. I am sending you happy thoughts of healing that you can pass on to your aunt. Hang in there and keep talking to us, we are all here for you right now.

01-03-2009, 12:27 AM
Thanks for all the prayers. They are much needed and have helped me calm down. She is having surgery on monday at noon. I might leave work early to be there or else I'll go after my rhuemy appt that afternoon. She has to spend this weekend "cleaning" herself out. Yuck! I feel so bad for her, wish I could make it go away. She's the youngest patient the surgeon has ever had. I guess we just got a bad deal too bad we can't redeal in life like you can with cards...

01-03-2009, 01:21 AM
I just had surgery and had to do the whole cleaning yourself out.......all I have to say is that I walked lighter into surgery :!: I will be thinking about your aunt on Monday and send her wonderful thoughts :wink: Hang in there and keep us posted on how she does.

01-05-2009, 11:14 PM
Thanks for all your prayers everyone. My aunt had her tumor removed and they didn't see any more. We are just waiting on a final ct scan but I know it will be normal. When she woke up tonight she was worried about people seeing her without make up. Its so funny the stuff we say waking up from surgery. Lol!! Thanks again. I really appreciate it.

Mary Jane
01-05-2009, 11:56 PM
Karli, I sooo happy to hear that. :D I hope her recovery goes well.

01-19-2009, 06:42 PM
Well my aunt just got the results from all the tests. She has stage 4 colon cancer that has spread to her liver and part of her lung. She has about a 10% chance of remission. I'm really upset, don't know what to do. 4
She has been sick for 6 yrs now, telling the drs something is wrong. She was dx with fibro told she was a hypocondriact (sp?) And sent to counseling. She finally changed drs and eventually developed abdomen pain so was sent for colonoscopy. I don't know what to do, just feel like crying for a few. Please pray...

Mary Jane
01-19-2009, 10:51 PM
Wow, I'm sorry to hear that. I'll say a prayer for your aunt. Just remember, miracles do happen. Try to stay positive for her.

01-20-2009, 02:52 AM
Karli, I am so sorry :!: This is very sad and very scary and I hope you are doing as well as can be expected. I am thinking of you and your family and sending you thoughts of peace and keeping all of you in my prayers. Take this time to enjoy your aunt and to show her how much you love .

It is very frustrating to hear that she has been trying to talk to the doctors for so long and they never listened :!: It is unfair and I wish there was something that could be done about this. We go to them for help and guidance and in the end they turn their backs on us and we are left with more questions than answers!

Keep posting and we are here for you. When you have a bad day hop on and we will all be here to listen and help you get through this :wink:

01-20-2009, 07:54 AM
Everything sounded like it was going well, I am sorry to hear about this new discovery. I have a lifelong family friend in chemo right now for breast cancer, it is a terrible thing to have to fight. Something needs to change in our healthcare system. I am fed up with Dr.'s turning away people like your aunt, telling them they are a hypochondriac, sending them to counseling. I hope your aunt can fight this and get through it.

01-26-2009, 10:45 PM
Thanks Rob. This so hard to deal with. I saw her tonight. She just got her port put in and is really down. She keeps talking about how she needs to get things in order in case she's not here. It is hard to not start crying. I wish I could make it all go away. I'm trying to get her to stay at my house so she can rest. I know this isn't good on my lupus. I'm flaring right now but seems so small compared to what she's going through. Atleast I know my organs aren't involved. I can just take percocet and get rid of pain. Anyways I hope your friend is doing ok.

Does anyone have any ideas on how to cope with this? I'm going crazy! I probably just need a good cry which I will get some out tonight.

Sorry this is so depressing but its where I am tonight. Hope tomorrow brings a better mood.

Thanks for the support everyone. I'm forever gratefully!


01-26-2009, 11:13 PM
Oh Karli,

I just read through this thread and I'm so sorry about your Aunt. Sometimes life is just too unfair. :mad:

I'll be praying for your Aunt. What is her name? I like to pray for a person specifically. And you can count on my prayers for you, as well. :angel:

I wish I had something to offer you to help you through this. Definitely, go ahead and have your cry. You definitely need to let go, and let the pain and anger and sadness out. :cry: :cry:

Don't let your Aunt give up. Try to surround her with positive thoughts and encouragement and tons of Love! And tell her people on this forum are praying for her every day.

Hugs for you,

Lori :)

01-26-2009, 11:38 PM
Thanks. I'll let her now. Her name is mary and will be celebrating her 41st birthday on friday. I have to think of something fun to do. She start chemo on monday.

Thanks for your prayers. I have to believe that God is our devine healer and he can do anything.

01-27-2009, 05:10 AM
hi karli,

I am so sorry to hear the latest information on your aunt mary. You mentioned finding something special to do for her birthday. I found the fight for my 31 year old daughter's fight with caner to be the most frightening thing that i had ever encountered.

We found a small amount of relief in laughter. For each special event, chemo, surgery, first radiation, etc. I would shop and find the funkiest rings that I could. Amber, her sister, and I would each have a moment of laughter at the crazy ring, and then as we wore them, we would have a moment to smile.

I know this does nothing to erase the horror of what you are facing, but at least something comical and silly gives you a moment of happiness.

please know that you and your aunt mary are in my prayers. don't forget to take care of yourself.

your friend,

01-29-2009, 09:15 PM
Oh...I am so, so sorry about your aunt. I lost my mother to colon cancer when I was 11, she was 52. I'm 45 now and have had 2 colonoscopies due to this. What is so awful about this is that this is a simple and effective procedure to screen for this disease. Why don't doctors listen? I can't bear to hear stuff like this because it should never be happening. I will be praying...for your aunt and you.