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SandraC1983
11-25-2008, 02:58 PM
:( :cry: I JUST CAME BACK FROM THE EYE DOCTOR. BAD NEWS GUYS THE PLAQUENIL HAS DONE PERMANENT DAMAGE TO MY RIGHT EYE AND TO THE LEFT . THE LEFT ISN'T AS BAD BUT THE RIGHT ISN'T DOING SO GOOD IM LOSING MY VISION ON THAT EYE.IM SO SAD. I DON'T KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH THIS. THIS IS HORRIBLE I WAS ONLY ON THE MEDICATION FOR 6 MONTHS . IM ASKING MYSELF WHY THIS HAPPENED AND I CANT SEEM TO FIND AN ANSWER.

WHAT A HORRIBLE YEAR IT'S BEEN FOR ME. :x :mad: :cry:



SANDRA

Saysusie
11-25-2008, 05:32 PM
Sandra;
Will this damage require surgery or is it something that can be corrected with prescription glasses? I know there are many types of surgeries that can help to correct some of the damage done by Plaquenil. Has your doctor discussed options with you? Please let us know. We are here for you.

Peace and Blessings
Saysusie

NoodleMom
11-25-2008, 05:54 PM
oh Sandra, Im sorry. Im sure that you are scared. Feeling sad too.

Is there any treatment for this? I was just put on plaquenil a month or so ago.
I went to the eye doctor so they could get a look at how they are now. It is scary to think that a medication for lupus can cause a person to go blind.

Praying for you hon.

Kasey

SandraC1983
11-25-2008, 06:38 PM
MY EYE DR CALLED MY PCP AND SHE IS GOING TO CALL MY RHEUMY I DONT KNOW WHAT ELSE WILL HAPPEN UNTIL I HEAR BACK FROM THEM I HAVE SO MANY MIXED EMOTIONS GOING ON IM MAD SAD AND MANY MORE NO WORDS DESCRIBE HOW I FEEL AT THE MOMENT I FILED FOR DISABILITY ONLINE TODAY AND I RECIEVED ANOTHER COMMENT FROM MY HUSBAND THAT IT WAS JUST AN EXCUSE NOT TO GET A JOB

KathyW1958
11-25-2008, 08:14 PM
Hi Sandra,
I am so sorry for the bad news that you got from the eye doctor. I hope that you don't completely lose your eyesight in your right eye.

Please don't listen to your husband's sarcastic remarks. He is ignorant and you need to look at him like he is ignorant. If my husband dared to say that to me he would get cussed out big time and then shown the door. I don't know how you can put up with him. He is doing nothing but putting you under more stress. Offload the toad hon. You know what I mean, like drop the zero and find you a hero that really loves and cares about you.

I will keep you in my prayers that they can do something to keep you from losing your eyesight.

Hugs,
Kathy

SandraC1983
11-25-2008, 08:34 PM
HE HAS HIS GOOD DAYS AND HIS BAD I HONESTLY THINK HE IS BIPOLAR HE IS HAPPY ONE MINUTE AND THE NEXT HE IS IN A REALLY BAD MOOD AND I HAVE TO DEAL WITH HIS WITCH OF A MOTHER FOR THANKSGIVING I HONESTLY NEED TO FIND AN EXCUSE NOT TO GO CAUSE EVERYTIME I GO TO HER HOME I START GETTING SICK THE STRESS SHE MAKES ME GO THROUGH IS UNREAL I THANK U KATHY FOR UR PRAYERS I HOPE I GET SOME NEWS FROM THE DOC SOON IM REALLY CONCERNED SO HOW R U FEELING MAM

jaideni
11-25-2008, 08:47 PM
I am so sorry to hear that. I hope that there is something that they can do to atleast make it more bearable. Also your husband sounds like he sucks, I hate to say it but I dont know what I would do if my family continued to be unsupportive after I got an actual diagnosis. I hope that you do have some other more understanding people in your life who could provide you with the emotional support that you need right now. I feel bad that you have to go through this without your husband. How people deal with the illnesses of others can be a real wake up call at how they really are. How would he feel if something happened to him that kept him from living the way he is accustomed Id bet he would want you right there by his side to hold his hand and feel his pain so why shouldnt you expect the same thing in return

KathyW1958
11-26-2008, 03:24 AM
Hi Sandra,
I am sorry for what I said about your husband. If he is bipolar then that would explain his behavior and he needs help for that. I think though that your mother-in-law is another story. I would just refuse to go and tell her and your husband that you are to sick to attend and that he can go without you. I did my mother-in-law like that a few times, because I could not stand her either. My husband would get pissed, but oh well and he made sure that he took the kids with him. I did not get along with her at all and my husband knew it big time.

I am having pain in my legs and knees and back and wrists again this morning. It is the same old same old.

I have to go to my daughters and watch my grandson today and I have to be there at 6:30 am. Well have to go now. Catch up with you later and I hope that you have a good day.

Hugs,
Kathy

NoodleMom
11-26-2008, 05:21 AM
Sandra,
I wasnt gonna say what I think of your husband but after hearing others say their thoughts I have a few choice words for your husband.
He is a jerk, ignorant and uncaring. Whatever happened to in sickness and in health? Has he ever come to any of your doc appts? I am so sorry that you are not getting the support you need from the one who should be there first and foremost. Tell him he should push a baby out thru his p*nis then he will know what pain is and how you feel at times only with no let up. Probably a bit crude. Hope i didnt offend.
If you think that he has bp maybe he should see a doc.

Hope that you get some answers sooner than later.

Kasey

hatlady
11-26-2008, 06:42 AM
Many many hugs of support, Sandra. I hope that you find the damage can be treated or reversed.

As far as that hubby - I hope he either gets treatment and then treats you better, or that he GROWS UP and treats you better!

rob
11-26-2008, 08:16 AM
I'm sorry Sandra. It's just one hit after another. It's not fair. You know, if you don't want to deal with your husbands family on Thanksgiving, tell them you are sick, and stay home. It's not like you would be telling a lie, but even if you did, you have to look out for you right now. All the stress, and negative BS can cause a flare as easily as being in the sun. I don't know what to say about your husbands comments, other than they are awful. You know you have friends here who care about you. Just get through today, and don't worry about tomorrow for now.

Rob

SandraC1983
11-26-2008, 08:31 AM
Sandra,
I wasnt gonna say what I think of your husband but after hearing others say their thoughts I have a few choice words for your husband.
He is a jerk, ignorant and uncaring. Whatever happened to in sickness and in health? Has he ever come to any of your doc appts? I am so sorry that you are not getting the support you need from the one who should be there first and foremost. Tell him he should push a baby out thru his p*nis then he will know what pain is and how you feel at times only with no let up. Probably a bit crude. Hope i didnt offend.
If you think that he has bp maybe he should see a doc.

Hope that you get some answers sooner than later.

Kasey



Sadly he has never gone to a Doc appt with me . Then when I tell him i have a appt he tells them at work my mother ends up taking me while he stays at home playing his xbox. Using my illness as an excuse not to go to work . He is on salary so it really doesn't matter he if is at work or not. He woke me up this morning complaining that I got him the wrong shirt. He had told me not to ever give him that shirt before ,but i forgot. Isnt wasnt my fault I JUST FORGOT. Its not crude what you said. You didn't offend me. There are times I gets so pissed off at him I want to turn into Lorena Bobbett myself. I just never say anything to him.

Kathy,

I do think he should get some help but once again money is the issue with him he claims he doesn't have money to be spending to go to the dr. I say BULL I know we have the funds. He doesn't even have to pay a copay for the visit and his meds are only 10.00 with the insurance. As far as my mother in law i don't even trust the woman with my kids. I found out something that really botherd me this yr . My own sister in law told me. That one day that the baby was over there alone. My mother in law was taking her a bath. Well my sister in law walked in on her and my daughters head was under water. well my sister in law got the baby called me and told me to come pick her up i didn't know anything about this until the beginning of this yr when she told me . she told me not to trust her. I also found out that my mother in law thinks im a worthless wetback. I forgot to tell you all the im hispanic and my husband is white. Funny as i woke up this morning he told me the world doesn't revolve around me it revolves around money . And that i needed to work. *SIGH* but to bad. Anyway thanks for being there for me i really appreciate it.

Love you all
Have a HAPPY THANKSGIVING

SANDRA

KathyW1958
11-26-2008, 08:53 AM
Hi Sandra,
You don't have to worry about being Hispanic. I am part Hispanic on my fathers side of the family and part American Indian and Jewish on my mothers side of the family, so basically I am a hiens 57 mixture. I don't judge anyone about their race, because when you turn down the lights everyone looks the same. In the eyes of God everyone is equal.

I would never trust that mother-in-law you have, because it seems like she is dangerous with children big time. I never trusted my mother-in-law with my children either and boy she never babysat my kids. My husbands parents were severe alcoholics and mean drunks at that. She would get pissed when we would go anywhere and we were visiting and I would take the kids with us. She told me that she had a right to watch the kids and she tried to get my husband, her son, to take her side and he never would. I just feel so bad for you.

Couldn't you husband get into trouble for staying out of work and using your appointment as an excuse to play his video games at home. If I were you I would not tell him when your appointments are and that way he would be forced to stay at work. Hmmm just sounds like you have a bad situation. I feel so bad for you.

Hugs,
Kathy

SandraC1983
11-26-2008, 09:01 AM
HAHA MY MOTHER IN LAW SAYS THE SAME THING I HAVE THE RIGHT TO WATCH THAT BABY . WITCH NO YOU DONT SHE USE TO SAY THE BABY WASN'T MY HUSBANDS SO SHE HAS NO RIGHT. OH THAT WOMEN HAS DONE SO MUCH HARM TO ME. ITS BEEN RUFF FOR ME THESE PAST SIX YRS OF MY MARRIED LIFE. HELL I DIDNT LEAVE MY HOUSE WHEN I WAS PREGNANT MY HUSBAND WAS TERRIFIED OF HER FINDING OUT . AND I THINK HE HAD REASONS. CAUSE WHEN WE SEE HER IN PUBLIC HE ONLY LETS HIS MOM HOLD HER FOR A LITTLE BIT AND HE TAKES HER AWAY I SHALL QUESTION HIM ABOUT THAT . ITS CONCERNING DON'T YA THINK.
AND I HAVEN'T BEEN TELLING HIM ABOUT MY APPT. LOL AND FROM NOW ON I WONT BE TELLING HIM SINCE HE IS NOT INTERESTED IN WHATS REALLY GOING ON WITH ME. THEN HE SHOULDN'T HAVE TO KNOW. RIGHT??

KathyW1958
11-26-2008, 09:16 AM
Wow it sounds like your mother-in-law is a lot like mine. My mother-in-law came right out and asked me if the two children my husband I have were really his children. Oh I went off big time on her. I told her that her boy was all present and accounted for when these children were being made. She said, well my husband and I have brown eyes and these kids have green eyes. I said hmmmm, your son has green eyes so who have you been laying and playing with when you got prego for him? Oh my lordy she got mad and told me to get out of her house. I said fine and started packing up the kids. My husband said a mom we don't want to leave. I just got the kids ready and headed for the door and I told my husband you can go with me or you can stay and walk home. He wisely decided to go with me. It was like about 3 years before we went back there.

I am glad that you are not going to let him know in the future when your appointments are. I don't blame you at all.

Hugs,
Kathy

SandraC1983
11-26-2008, 09:32 AM
oh his mom has gone off the deep end alot of times. a couple of xmas ago she gave my husband and I some rings. well the following year she said that was the only reason i was nice to her. well i went to my husband and took his ring and took mine off ... and told her you can take them and put them up her bum and i got my keys the baby and my husband and left. she called as soon as we got home and had the nerve to ask if we were coming back to open presents . I was in aw i didn't know whether to hang up tell her off or give the phone to my husband. This woman has gone to the point of getting a private investigator on me. She is CUCU for coco puffs!!!

KathyW1958
11-26-2008, 10:39 AM
Hi Sandra,
It sounds like the woman has serious mental issues big time. I think I would try to avoid her as much as humanly possible. Sometimes when people have a lot of money they are evil to the bone and believe me they will pay for it in the end. My mother-in-law came from money and well the money sure didn't help her lead a good life. She drank herself to death, what a crappy way to die. I thought that it was funny. Sorry, but I could not stand her at all. Some people are just plain nasty and no matter what you do you can not change them. I hope that you can have a good time over the holidays and not let her destroy them for you. I will have you in my prayers.

Hugs,
Kathy

DrinkofWtr
11-26-2008, 11:06 AM
I am sorry about your eyes. I am scared to death of taking plaquenil. My reading vision is about as bad as it gets. So far I have avoided taking it.

DrinkofWtr
11-26-2008, 11:12 AM
Speaking of mother-in-law's, mine was rich. She was always claiming she was so poor. After my husband died in 1992, she treated me like crap! Not that she treated me so well before then. I feel for you Sandra C!

BonusMom
11-26-2008, 04:12 PM
MY EYE DR CALLED MY PCP AND SHE IS GOING TO CALL MY RHEUMY I DONT KNOW WHAT ELSE WILL HAPPEN UNTIL I HEAR BACK FROM THEM I HAVE SO MANY MIXED EMOTIONS GOING ON IM MAD SAD AND MANY MORE NO WORDS DESCRIBE HOW I FEEL AT THE MOMENT I FILED FOR DISABILITY ONLINE TODAY AND I RECIEVED ANOTHER COMMENT FROM MY HUSBAND THAT IT WAS JUST AN EXCUSE NOT TO GET A JOB

I am so sorry that you received this bad news today AND that your husband was anything but supportive.

Saysusie
11-27-2008, 11:15 AM
Sandra;
It might be beneficial for you to print up some of the posts on these forums that can help to educate your husband about your illness. I know someone has already introduced you to "The Spoon Theory", it might help if you also let him read it.
I am hoping that, if he is educated about your illness, he will become less selfish and self-centered (because that appears to be his position). There is little hope of you finding a way to avoid stress, unhappiness, etc. if you are not getting any support from the most important person in your life. This lack of support and dismissive attitude is contributing to your inability to recover. Stress is one of the most dangerous things that we (lupus sufferers) have to deal with. It can cause us to have a serious flare-up and can keep us from recovering from the exacerbation of symptoms.
If your husband learns nothing else, he needs to learn that his attitude is causing you additional stress and your stress is causing your illness to linger and to worsen. I hope that he cares enough to want to learn about this illness and learn how he can help you to overcome some of your symptoms.
In the meantime, you know that we are all here to help you and to support you as much as we can. You are safe with us and we will never doubt your feelings or question your motives. We all understand and we know that what you are describing is real!

Peace and Blessings
Saysusie