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deester
10-28-2008, 09:47 PM
Hello dear Lupus, Sjogrens, Raynauds. Are you having a good time? I suppose you all know my news. I am not having a good time. No, been abed for 5 days. And you all know why to. Yes you do, you kept me from seeing my only child win her very first costume contest Saturday. Did you know that? You have kept me trapped in my house, in my dark bedroom. Did you really need to do all that? Haven't the years and years of pain, memory loss, swelling, hair loss, purple hands, splotchy skin, red rashes, swollen joints been enough? Have not the loss of friends who were to afraid of what they didn't understand and the inability to build a snowman with my child been enough for you? Has not the sacrafice of my babies that i couldn't carry been enough? What about my eyesight that goes in waves of blurrs and flashes out the corners of my eyes or the loss of my teeth? Still not enough for you? Tell me what will be enough for you then.

You beat me down but like an action hero I get back up every single time! I may be battered and bruised at the end but I am back up again! I may not get the key to the city or a medal of Valor but I get the smile from my child and the hug from husband and the flowers and calls from my fire department and that is worth more than any medal. I would get up from my coffin to see my daughter's smile and feel my husband's arms! Threaten me and keep me down for days if it makes you feel better! Just know dear diseases, that I will get back up again!


Funny how the doctor said that I was on the upswing then I find myself in to much pain, with fevers, and can't stay awake for a number of days. Was that your parting gift to me? Honestly, you could have just sent a postcard! I would have been content with that! So, in the future please, just a postcard. I don't need any more gifts like that. I have enough. Thanks for thinking of me though.

Sincerely,
DEE :mad:

sits_inthe_corner
10-29-2008, 04:18 PM
Awww gentle hugs to ya Dee,

Move over I'll be sliding in for a good flare myself soon. The past two weeks have been very stressful.

I just have to get through tomorrow then as soon as I start to relax my body will rear up and let me have it.

That's always the way with me. I handle stressful events just fine and then pay the price as soon as things get back to "normal"

Hope you start feeling better soon.

Saysusie
10-30-2008, 07:59 PM
Dee;
So sorry that Lupus insists upon making personal appearances with its own special little gifts! Like you, I've been holed up in my house and out of commission for quite a while.....I know it is no fun at all.
I'm at the point where I don't even want a post card, like...just forget that you even know me and just leave me alone!!! :evil:
Oh well, I do hope that you start to feel better soon. In the meantime, I'm sending warm hugs and thoughts!!

Peace and Blessings
Saysusie

hatlady
11-01-2008, 10:36 AM
Oh Dee, all I can send is gentle hugs. But if I find lupus's letter in your box....I'll risk the penalties of mail tampering and rip it to shreds for you.

~more gentle hugs~

deester
11-02-2008, 01:38 PM
When I first posted I wasn't sure what I wrote would be understood. This is what was in my head and the words just roled out and I kept talking to my diseases.

I am so glad to know I was understood and not alone. I feel bad. I haven't had much time or energy to read and post to others since I joined here and I feel a bit guilty. I have received such support and love and haven't had much to give in return. I will I promise. I just need a bit more time to get myself together.

sits_inthe_corner
11-02-2008, 04:35 PM
Hugs deester

We understand. Some days all I do is read posts. Hope you are feeling better soon.

Saysusie
11-02-2008, 09:43 PM
Of course we understand......we've all been there at one time or another, and we've all wondered if we even had enough left in us to form a complete sentence!

Hope that you feel better soon! :lol:

Peace and Blessings
Saysusie

rob
11-03-2008, 02:02 AM
I understood right away what you meant Deester. Some days, I go off in a fit of anger and frustration yelling and cussing out loud at Lupus, like it was a person. It's like we are fighting a faceless enemy. It's OK Deester, we know what you mean.

mnjodette
11-05-2008, 05:54 AM
Oh, we understand, Deester....believe me, we do. No explanations needed. I never get complacent. My buddy lupus (and all of his cohorts) can put in an appearance at any time. I hope today is a better day, Dee. Hey, maybe you can have your "mail" forwarded - to some bad guy that deserves those "gifts."

Hugs....
Jody

Oluwa
11-18-2008, 03:07 PM
Hi Deester....

Wondering how you are? Still stumbling, feeling bad? Is there anything I can, we can do to comfort you?

We don't acknowledge guilt here...so worry not about not posting individually...reading your feelings about you, your Dear Hello Lupus...is comforting in the way, there is someone, you... who is like us..who gets what we feel. Who knows what it is like and is going through the same pain, anger, frustration...

Thinking of you...miss you Dee...

Hugs,
Love,
Oluwa


I was on vacation when you posted this, so I didn't read it till today when I went to look for you...