View Full Version : extremely personal question

09-24-2008, 08:18 PM
i dont want to ask it but i need advice before my hubby wanders....he says he wont but the fear....

my lower abdomen on the right and left side HURT badly. Not so low as ovary level but not as high as lung/rib pain. Maybe kidney area. My stomach has been bloated something fierce lately to. I feel every bomp, thump, and rub like a hot knife. Between this and my hips, our bedroom life is almost nil. I want so badly to make him happy in that area but I can not do "it" without tears. I dont know what to do or what this new pain is and I am embarresed to admit we have only done "it" 3 times this month. Twice before the lower abdomen pain got almost unbearable. I can not stand to see his face when he knows he has hurt me, it breaks my heart but I cant hide it anymore either. :oops: any advice?

09-24-2008, 08:52 PM
Go to the doctor find out what is wrong. dont do anything if you are uncomfortable or especially in pain. I had a similar problem and had to admit defeat, luckily my boyfriend was very understanding about it. Please find something else to do to make you guys feel closer for now. Just until you get control of this pain. Go to the doctor ,please. Then you can see about getting that number back up to normal! Good luck!

And please tell your husband beforehand that you are in pain. Dont wait until hes trying to get things started as it might sound like an excuse. Make him knowledgeable about everything you are going through and make him aware of you pain so he can better avoid doing anything that may cause you more pain. Thats the speech I get from my boyfriend so I guess it might be a man thing

09-25-2008, 01:58 AM
I think that you should see a doctor as soon as possible about this problem. It could be something very serious. Have you been checked for Endometreosis? I hope that you see a doctor and very soon for this problem.


09-25-2008, 05:25 AM
Hi Deester...How are you this day?

Ditto, see you doctor as soon as possible. It could be a myriad of things. Uterus, ovaries, intestines, etc by simple palpitating, manipulating with their fingers over your abdomen, they should be able to locate area, organ in question...

Please call today...sex isn't suppose to be painful and I believe, I would hope your husband would be understanding of this. Sex isn't an obligation, or a duty..an intimate moment of tender love...not painful love...

Head hugs...

09-25-2008, 06:35 AM
Bless your hart i feel for you but do see you doc about it i had simillar kind of pains but mine has turned out to be a virus which i have now had for about nine months they told me they wanted to leave it to see if it would go away it self but its not.
Dont put your self through pain if you are not up to it i am sure he will understand.

09-25-2008, 01:35 PM
Hey deester

How are you feeling? And what did the doctor say? Cause I'm just sure sure sure you went ... right? huh? huh?

If not I'm calling your guy and telling him to drag you in :lol:

I do have a cyst on my ovary and it hurts very badly. But at least I know what it is...I've even named it...Betty :P .

But you my dear...do not know what it is...could be a gaulbladder issue or any ol thing.

Best to get it sorted out so you and your fella can find better things to do with your time :)

Hugsss...keeping you in my thoughts.

09-25-2008, 03:48 PM
o ok. i read the replies earlier today and dragged myself off to the doctors. she is concerned this is a kidney issue and took lots of blood and urine and poked at my belly. Ya know I wish they wouldnt do that. I already told her it hurt. It is not a cyst issue, I have plenty of those and this is totally different and up higher. It may be Monday before I know any results though.

Thanks for giving me the kick i needed. i'm heading to bed now....been a long day.

09-26-2008, 02:11 AM
Hugs deester

I'm so glad you went to the doctors, your on the way to finding out and getting treatment.

I'm holding you in my heart and praying that you feel better soon. It's so easy to take care of other's needs and forget to take care of your own. If that was your fella hurting you'd have dragged him to the doctor's yourself...I'm the same way with my sweetness.

I dread going to the doctor's but if he isn't well, oh he's GOING in :lol: .

09-28-2008, 02:11 PM
Hugs dear, I'm so glad your doctor is on this, and concerned as we are. Please let us know how this turns out. I"m sure your hubby is concerned as well!

09-28-2008, 07:54 PM
I am so glad you went to the doctor. I hope that you will be alright. Good luck

09-29-2008, 07:58 AM
Well I just got the call to go back in for repeat and added blood work. All she told me was that some of it came back "abnormal" and then told me not to worry....yea right. :roll: My tummy is so bloated I cant get my jeans on...

09-29-2008, 09:03 AM
Hugsss deester

Good luck, let us know how you make out?

09-29-2008, 08:43 PM
Deester -
What is with these Dr. people telling us that things are abnormal, but not to worry? How about a bit more information for us so we can decide for ourselves whether or not to worry?

Here's my suggestion (maybe at some point you can remind me of it...) You do the concern, but give it up to God when you start to worry. You are doing exactly what you are able - seeing the Dr. and getting the labs done. Now you can just pray that God helps the doctor get to the bottom of the problem sooner rather than later. I'll be praying for your Dr. to have wisdom and for you to have peace rather than worrying.

On another topic, I completely understand your whole gamut of emotions regarding the painful relations with your husband. I was diagnosed in February with this "fabulous" little autoimmune thing called lichen sclerosis, and mine is in the private area. I actually haven't been able to have relations with my husband this whole year. I don't think we will be able to in the future.
I thought for sure this would open a door for him to walk out, although we've been married for 15 years. But I underestimated him. I shared all of my feelings with him and how sad it makes me, which was probably the best thing I could have done. It gave him a chance to confim to me that this isn't the most valuable thing about our relationship. Expect great things from your husband - I bet this could actually bring you closer in a lot of ways, and add to your respect for him (which I bet he wants just as much as your lovin')

You might get "lucky" and your doc will be able to find the problem and treat it so you can get back to your regularly scheduled program :)

Hugs to you, sister.

10-01-2008, 10:44 AM
Well it would appear I have a kidney infection. The doc wasn't to specific. She called in 2 prescriptions to WalMart that I must now find a ride and the $$ to go get. They are both antibiotics and I wonder what kind of infection requires 2 antibiotics? pooey.

10-01-2008, 12:25 PM
Sounds like maybe they don't know what type of infection yet, so they are going to give you two antibiotics to cover the most likely territory until they can figure it out with more specific labs.

I hope you are able to get the antibiotics and start taking them fast - kidney infections are no good. Chasing that bad boy out of town sounds like a good plan. I hope you start feeling better quickly.