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ethanandrew
02-26-2008, 05:25 PM
hi

In the last few weeks Ihave noticed and so have others that Iam more out spoken and moody. I used to be a very passive person, nothing seemed to bother me. Now Ifeel like if somthing makes me upset just a little bit I almost have to run in the other room with my hand over my mouth so I dont say anything. Ifeel like Iam somebody else. I have been on my meds for 6 months , so I dont think thatthey are doing it . Does lupus cause personality changes?

sits_inthe_corner
02-26-2008, 06:52 PM
I dont think lupus it's self alters your emotions or personality...least not that I've seen. Other's may be able to shed more light on that. Some of the medications can have some affect.

Stress can have an affect and lord knows dealing with lupus can be stressful. I've mentioned before that I get suddenly and deeply exhausted. I find my tolerence disappears when this happens. That's the first sign I have that I'm exhausted.

I'm 48 yrs old. I've had early signs of menopas since I was 35. Mood swings, anxiety...and a raft of other enjoyable symptoms.

Have a word with your doctor. Be gentle to yourself. You have alot to deal with. Take care of yourself; eat right and get a good night's sleep and excersize.

Your doctor should be able to help you sort out what is behind the mood swings.

Hugsss hope you get the answers you are looking for :)

jesseyleigh
02-26-2008, 10:19 PM
i think when you dont feel well you tend to get more emotional, i know the worse i feel the more cranky i am!

sick n tired
02-26-2008, 10:32 PM
What drugs are you taking? I know that steroids like prednisone do change the moods.

On a diffferent note, I had something like this happen to me 11 years ago. At first I thought that it was because of the valley we were traveling then I read a book that suggested that it was hormones. The book theorizes that women are taught to be submissive and kind of "take-it-on-the-chin" silently. so at a certain point in there life, they change and decide not to "suffer" in silence. I am not sure if hormones are the case or if it is experiential.

I am not the same person I was in my 20s and 30s. We lost a child 11 years ago. I can guarantee that experience has totally shaped my life and who I am today. I realized that there are things that happen in our lives whether good(ie birth of a child) or bad( death of a loved one, or illness) that shape us. I had to find a new normal for my life, for instance. The new normal has to emcompass what has happened. There was a before and then there is now.

That said, you are not the same. You know a before Lupus came to stay with you and now there is now. Many of go through a mourning time and all or at least some of the stages of grief.

Saysusie
02-28-2008, 11:34 AM
Emotional problems are common in people with Lupus. We suffer from problems such as depression and anxiety. These problems can cause us to be moody, irritable, and even angry (to name a few). We also suffer from forgetfulness, trouble concentrating (paying attention to a task), dizziness, and confusion. Sometimes we also have trouble expressing our thoughts. Doctors refer to our depression as "Clinical Depression", which is quite different from the normal depression that everyone feels now and then. Ours can become just as chronic as our disease. Look at these symptoms of clinical depression and see how some of them overlap with the symptoms of Lupus:
*sadness and gloom
*spells of crying (often without a cause)
*insomnia or restless sleep, or sleeping too much
*loss of appetite, or eating too much
*uneasiness or anxiety
*irritability
*feelings of guilt or regret
*lowered self-esteem
*inability to concentrate
*diminished memory and recall
*indecisiveness
*lack of interest in things formerly enjoyed
*fatigue

Also, as Sick-n-Tired mentioned, some of the medications that we take for our Lupus can also cause changes in our moods. So, do not feel that there is something psychologically wrong with you. You are exhibiting symptoms that are not uncommon. Many of us, also, are seen regularly by therapists, counselors, clergy, psychologists etc. in order to care for our emotional health as well as our physical health. I think that the two are intertwined and both should be treated with equal importance.

Peace and Blessings
Saysusie

rob
02-28-2008, 12:21 PM
My personality has changed drastically since being diagnosed with SLE. Actually it started before that. I find myself in a perpetual state of frustration. Losing my ability to spell is a major source of frustration. I use a voice recognition program now to dictate my comments, posts, e-mails and such. Being tired, in pain, getting flak from people, all have had an effect. The experience of having the rug pulled out from under me just as I was realizing my dream of a wife, family, and my own business, has made me bitter and angry. I don't think my moods really have much to do with my meds. I take Plaquenil, and Naproxen. I overheard some people saying I've lost the gleam in my eye, and the spring in my step. I'm easily angered now, where before I was really patient. I deal the best I can, that's all any of us can really do. Some days will be good, others not. I does help to talk with a group of people who understand, like the people here do. In the end, you have to adapt, and accept certain things. It's easier said than done though.

sits_inthe_corner
02-28-2008, 04:03 PM
hugsss rob....I hear ya. I am constantly thinking I need to redefine who I am and accept that. I'm tired of wondering what's coming next and worrying about everthing.

So far I haven't had any reaction from the people around me. Non at all. LOL I think if I showed up with a bag over my head no one would notice :lol:

I want things to go back to the way they were, but that's just not going to happen. I swing between being okay with the way things are to being angry and frustrated....and scared. Bottom line is things are never going back to the way they were.

I've got to figure out who I am now and who I want to be and work towards that.

Oluwa
02-28-2008, 06:38 PM
Saysusie..

Do you have my medical record? I have 12 of the 13 listed. It is hard to believe that is me...it really is.

Times I can't believe this is my body, my flesh that carries my spirit. A vehicle that is broken. And in order to salvage my spirit I have to ignore the frame that it comes in. When I have to battle the bones, the muscles, the pain, the weakness and I begin to lose, the 12 of 13 appear.

This is me, Oluwa..eyes, without a face. Just my window to my soul.

Pretti in Pink
02-28-2008, 07:04 PM
I think at any given time, those symptoms could be any of us, it's just that now we can say we have a reason where as before we just seemed blume CRAZY! So, IT comes in hand. :roll:

Saysusie
02-29-2008, 09:01 AM
Oluwa;
I know what you mean. I was diagnosed with Lupus in 1985. I went through all of those symptoms of Lupus and Depression. Then, in 1999, I suffered a loss that I would not wish upon anyone. My clinical depression took a nose dive, almost to the point of institutionalization. My doctors, psychiatrists, therapist and minister had a job on their hands. It was like I was in a deep black hole and, while I could see hands reaching out to me from the top of the hole and hear voices calling to me from the top of the hole, I wanted to just continue to surround myself with the darkness. The empty blackness of nothing and nowhere, the comfort of being no-one and nothing was so much more appealing to me. I think I moved within that darkness for a year or more until one day, my mother's hands were reaching down from the rim of my black hole and, for some reason, I could hear her voice. I took her hand and slowly crawled to the top. I think that I teetered on the rim for several years! At some times during the year, I think that I still venture to that rim and look down and can feel the darkness calling out to me. But now, the voices outside of the rim are loud and clear and I don't linger there as long as I used to.
Wow, that was a depressing story in and of itself.
Anyway, as you all have pointed out, depression is something that we all have had to deal with, recognize, understand and try to abate. As Rob said, it is much easier said than done. But we have to work at it, constantly. Tending to our psychological and emotional health is just as hard a task as is tending to our physical health. It requires constant care and even treatment. No, we are not crazy.....we have to hold on to that. We have to stand up for our right to be treated for ALL of the symptoms of this disease, and that includes the symptoms of depression!

Peace and Blessings
Saysusie

mnjodette
02-29-2008, 09:11 AM
It's so reassuring to hear from others that they feel the same things I feel. (I guess that's what support groups are for, right?) I've battled depression from time to time in my life (like everyone, I guess.) But when I got "sick" I never expected to feel the grief and loss that I've felt. Part of me is lost; part of what I hoped to be is gone now. When I have a good day, my hubby says "you're almost like yourself again." I know he means well, but that makes me so very sad. What am I the rest of the time? Who am I? OK....that's enough....I'm getting teary here. :cry: Anyway - it IS good to share those experiences with people who really know what I'm talking about.

Jody

pooie95
02-29-2008, 03:49 PM
Typical symptoms for me during the start of a flare are:
1. Anxiety
2. Obsessing about certain events (things that shouldn't consume my time).

When I notice I'm having these symptoms, I usually adjust my meds. I truely believe lupus affects our moods and affects us cognitively.

This article just came out about the subject.

http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/99072.php

Oluwa
02-29-2008, 06:00 PM
Saysusie,

I felt your pain as if is was my own. Thank you for sharing a part of you that you so eloquently wrote. I felt your teetering as if it was me. Step back, step back...I said in my thoughts to you.

Whatever it is, whatever it takes we need to keep listening, keep looking for someone, something, some thought to push us back, a foot, a yard. I am happy Saysusie you heard your Mum...

To all, The dark hole makes reality seem so surreal, that we think happiness maybe just a pipe dream. Happiness isn't a given, it is found. It can be anywhere, in anything...seek, it is there..

I am still seeking in this game of Hide 'n' Seek...I wish it was easy as saying all ye, all ye come in free.
Oluwa

sits_inthe_corner
03-01-2008, 07:47 AM
Part of the reason I started the post about things that perk me up is because when I listened to that music and it lifted my spirits...I hadn't realized how low my spirtits were.

So I started making a mental list of things I enjoy but haven't done in a while. I think I need to make a written list of those things and post it where I well remember them and do them.

It's so easy to get surrounded by the darkness and to forget to look for the light.

Reminds me of that little ol song...This little light of mine. I need to find my little lights and turn them on :)

Saysusie
03-01-2008, 09:09 AM
Oluwa and Sits;
You are absolutely right, we must continue to reach for the light and let it shine.
I agree that we should continually take stock of those things and those moments that bring a smile to our faces. Once we find those things and those moments, we should celebrate them.
As my motto says below - "Look for the GOOD and PRAISE it!"

Peace and Blessings
Saysusie

mnjodette
03-01-2008, 02:40 PM
SITC, making a list is such a good idea. We use lists for everything else, why not as a reminder of those things that get us through the rough patches? I like it...thanks. This was a good thread...thanks for that, too!

Jody