View Full Version : First Rhume visit

08-10-2006, 07:25 AM
I am going today for my first Rhume visit. I have been dealing with the Lupus symptoms for over three years...was told I have Fifths Disease back then. I am really nervous and scared. My three children have to come to the appt with me because my husband can't get off work and I have no family around here. I am extremely overwhelmed and have been crying all morning. (of corse I have been hiding it from the kids because I don't want them to be scared) I have heard horror stories about doctors not believing the patients symptoms. I don't want to show up and be promptly dismissed with a perscription for Tylenol 3. I have been keeping a symptom log for the past month, so that will help me when it comes to explaining it all to the dr. I am not quite sure why I am posting this. I just felt like venting. I am so hurt that my husband won't get off work....I guess that's it. I am not really mad, I've just been building myself up emotionally for this visit, I would prefer to not have the kids with me. Anyway, thanks for listening!

08-10-2006, 10:18 AM

08-10-2006, 11:29 AM
I hope your visit went well with the rheumy. Let us know

08-10-2006, 08:33 PM
I really feel for you. I know how daunting this trip must seem, and knowing that you are going to have to keep it together for the kids sake just doesn't seem fair. Everyone should have a chance to cry, scream, or whatever. My docotor's office is right across the street from Wal-Mart. After we discussed the probability of Lupus for the first time I drove to the parking lot and just sat there. I guess I was in shock, but I needed that alone-time to prepare myself. I have struggled with how to tell my children about this illness. My worst fear is to frighten them. I am 31 years old and just the thought of losing my mother brings tears to my eyes. I don't want them to have those doubts and concerns. It's a mother's instinct to protect her children at all costs. Is that why you're so worried about taking them? I wish I could find the right words to say. I truly hope everything goes well. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Keep us posted.

08-11-2006, 11:57 AM
I totally understand what you are going through. I have been sick for about 18 months - two years. My kids know something is going on, but they are not sure what (they are 8 and 10). We sent them to their grandparents for two months. They are coming back this week and I got my diagnosis while they have been gone. I don't know what I am going to tell them. From what I understand, my daughter has been worried about me the whole time she has been gone. I have to tell them something. I know we are a family and we will all get through this together, but it just seems like so much for little kids to know.

Don't worry about the doctor not believing you, because if that happens, you will just have to take charge and find a doctor that does believe you. One thing I have learned in the last few years of suffering and revolving doctors is that you have to be in charge of your own care and confident that eventually, you will find the one that is right for you.

Take care and let us know what happened.

- Peach

08-11-2006, 02:05 PM
Mommy 3,
I am so sorry for everyothing you have been going through. I know exactly how you feel. I had lupus symptoms for 6 years before I was diagnosed. It is so frustrating! Just hang in there though. This is a WONDERFUL site to vent your frustrations, anxieties, ups and downs.
It is very hard when you have children to know what to say and handle situations. I have two children of my own (6 and 7).
I am not telling you what to say because everyones beliefs and family life is different. I just would like to give you some advice with what I explained to my children. First of all, I have worked in Pediatrics for 13 years, so I was exposed to a lot of different health situations between children and their parents. I talked with my childrens pediatrician and she advised me to sit with my children (on a good day) and tell them the name of my sickness and how it affects me. Let them know that it is OK. Some days you just need some chill out time. Grab a book, game, etc. and do something while you rest in the chair, bed, etc. I believe if you are up front with them, they will be your biggest supporters! I know how it feels not to want to burden your children.
I just thought I would share my story. I hope all goes well for you. Keep in touch!