View Full Version : I Wish I had the nerve

08-26-2013, 10:49 AM
I wish I had the nerve to stand up to my boss and tell him to kiss my broken toe! I've had problems with him in the past (everyone who works here has) and today is no exception: to put it delicately, I'm spending more time in the restroom than I am at my desk. And when I'm at my desk, I'm not feeling well and heading back to the restroom. You get what I mean. So, since I can't move my office to the restroom.... I went to the boss and told him as delicately as possible what was happening and that I'd prefer to suffer in the privacy of my own home. Well, I'm still here. He said NO. ????? He said I'd been taking too many Mondays off and what is going on? First of all, in the past 2 months I've taken TWO Mondays off- one a sick day and one an pre approved vacation day. Second of all, what going on? IDK ... LUPUS??? So here I am at my desk not only physically miserable but madder that all get out. I'm hoping a liberal dose of Pepto Bismol solves one of my problems but it won't help that extreme anger I'm feeling right now.

I have a major case of PTSD when it comes to men. He senses that and takes advantage of it. I'd rather flee than fight and for the moment, my fleeing is to the restroom...

I have Lupus. I don't whine about it or hardly ever talk about it at work. I have YET to ask for a reasonable accomodation even though I'm well within my rights to such as UV filters for the flourescent lights and computer screen. I've worked through migraines. I've worked through asthma type breathing attacks. I've worked through back spasms, extreme joint pain, colds and fevers. I'm an idiot. I'm also a hardworker and he knows it. I don't complain, I don't take time off for every little ache and pain otherwise I'd never go to work.

If I had the emotional strength to do so, I'd tell him to stuff it. But I don't. So I suffer.

08-26-2013, 11:36 AM
You are RIGHT when you say THEY DO have to ACCOMIDATE YOU since YOU have Lupus..Screw YOU GETTING SICKER Ruziska...THAT is NOT RIGHT..YOU will pay for this "HELL" you are in at work with YOUR HEALTH and ITS NOT WORTH IT....FIGHT the FIGHT!! WOO HOO!! I KNOW how my body gets from ANY type of UV light and ITS NOT GOOD..It causes inflammation which we all know causes MORE DAMAGE to our ORGANS..THEN to top it all off YOU are also flaring just from the STRESS of being there...You are HURTING yourself so badly and that makes me SAD for YOU...Take a Valium and take him "HEAD ON" to make changes for yourself...THAT should help with the PTSD part I would think..IT does ME!! LOL SERIOUSLY!! Please take CARE of YOU!!!! Love and Hugs!

08-26-2013, 10:53 PM
If I was there, I would be your advocate. I am sorry this is happening to you. Here is some information, links that may assist you, to help you discuss this with your employer or your immediate supervisor. Is it union? If so, see you shop steward or speak with an EEOC representative to guide you.


If it was me, I would just sit on the turlet and get paid to have a BM...why not? If he is unreasonable, then you need to do the reasonable thing and let it out to make yourself feel better.

I would make a list of the changes you would like to see your employer make regarding to accommodate Cousin IT..Lupus..because we don't have to be..''it is okay, I will sit in the dark.'' It is not okay. Seek out someone to be with you when you present it your employer. And have documentation to show he must provide you with the equipment you seek to help you with your Lupus symptoms and how many days you have taken off regarding Cousin IT.

Too, I would seek out a counselor for your PTSD, to find ways, skills on how to cope with it, or come to terms as to the cause. I have it too...my husband was killed in auto accident and I found out on the Internet and all that followed. I am a work in progress, so I know it is frightening for you. The important thing is now that we know we have it, we have to work to resolve it so we can live a fulfilled life with out being afraid.

The worst thing really anyone can say is No...the worse thing is we will get a frog in our throats and our eyes will swell with tears and we cy. If that happens, tell him "Now look what you did."

Have you found out what is making you frequent the turlet? Drugs, food?

Be well and I hope your BM issue has resolved...LOL...Hugs..O.

08-28-2013, 02:55 PM
Oh "Oluwa" ("SUNSHINE" wink wink), YOU are SO NEEDED and WANTED by MANY, and EVERY POST SCREAMS IT that you write dear friend...Remember what I have always said to you since my first time on here...YOu are AMAZING and have SO MUCH TO GIVE/SHARE to the world..THANK YOU..