View Full Version : Financial needs

06-28-2006, 06:29 AM
There are several messages here from people very worried and maybe even panicked about how they will be able to survive financially. I wanted to share my experience which may give people some hope.

Let me tell you, I've been right where you are. When I first became sick, I went through denial, pushing myself to work full-time which only made me sicker and more exhausted until I finally collapsed. I lost the ability to read and comprehend, so I was rendered completely unable to even fill out a simple form. I knew I would not be able to work for some time, and possibly never f/t again. The panic in me - Oh my God! I was sure I'd end up on the street. I had no mortgage, but rent that was quite affordable while I worked was suddenly astronomical. Also a car note, from a compact car I'd bought the year before. (Should I sell my car and take the bus, or would I need my car someday to LIVE IN??!!!) Add to that food, utilities and HEALTH INSURANCE $500 month, plus out-of-pocket medical costs for things not covered by the insurance ... etc. Of course, I prayed, prayed and prayed some more.

I would lay awake nights wondering how I'd survive... would I move into my car? Would I be able to keep my beloved 16-year-old cat in my car? I phoned shelters to see if they'd take my dear cat. I gathered numbers of homeless shelters for me. What would my Maker have me do to manage this crazy life?

But something wild happened. Every time I was on the brink of disaster, money would come in. First there was temporary disability (state). That ran out. I dissolved my 401(k) and used that as my cushion. That was drained. Then my mother sent me a few thousand dollars, until her own health care needs loomed (for her terminal illness), and I stopped accepting money from her so she'd be okay. Then social security came through (thanks to my lawyer). But that barely covered rent.

Then I hooked up with an animal rescue group and began receiving money for taking care of abandoned pets. I couldn't read, but dang it, I could feed and pamper and scoop up after animals that were once loved. (Like me?) Each time it seemed it was all over, something would come through, and each time I felt less scared. My Maker seemed to have answers waiting for me just around the corner. As if pre-ordained.

Last year some added expenses piled up, and once again I teetered on the brink of ... what? This time I was nervous, but not terrified. And woosh! My disability lawyer got a partial benefits payment. (claim for the rest still pending, four years after dx!) Enough to see me through another couple years. And on it goes.

It occurred to me the other day that while I'm always taking steps to gather benefits, the panicky feeling is gone. I don't even really feel scared anymore, don't have troubled dreams about it, have stopped thinking that the pet food I give my animals will one day be my dinner too! My Maker has His plan, and although I don't understand it, I trust it completely.

Now - to put it in perspective - I still struggle to squeeze into my modest budget, and am still scrounging for resources. But... All is very well with me.

Please do not give up! Be realistic, face your troubles and by all means, take action to protect yourself. If someone has wronged you in this, do battle with them if you feel it's proper. People will disappoint you, again and again, but the world is a place of bounty... one true friend will prove more valuable than the handful that disappeared. A nice, warm apartment, a cup of hot tea, enough money for dinner... there is the bounty... trust it!

06-28-2006, 10:33 AM

PLUS THE STRESS on your body is the WORST thing you can do to yourself.


06-29-2006, 12:45 PM
That was beautiful, eductional and inspirational. "For I walk by faith and not by sight!"

Thank You So Much, that was much needed!

Peace and Blessings