View Full Version : so hurt

10-02-2012, 06:58 PM
I'm feeling so hurt by my dad's comment. I stupidly mentioned my lupus to him and said that maybe I'll have to go to the doctor if I don't get better soon and then he said isn't it just caused by stress, what can they do anyway, I said they can increase my medication and he was like or you could learn to deal with stress. Grrrr. I don't think he even knows what lupus is, he obviously doesn't know much if he doesn't know there are things they can do to help, he hasn't listened to my experience at all, which is that medications have actually helped me and doctors make me feel like I'm not mad and offer support. He has all these weird ideas about illness so I usually avoid mentioning it but I did this time which was just stupid of me. Even if stress has caused this flare to be worse than usual I'm not stressed anymore, I'm just sick and I want to feel better. Sorry for the rant but it is really frustrating that my family have no idea.

10-02-2012, 07:52 PM
Sorry your dad responded the way he did. If he is open to it, show him everything you c an about lupus. Educate him. If he isn't, then shame on him and do your best to not let him get to you. Good luck and remember that we are here for you

10-02-2012, 08:20 PM
Obviously unless your in our shoes it's really hard for people to understand what you are going through. Since it is your family it hits you harder than if it was somebody else. My twin sister after 7 years, even through months of hospital stays, still says things like that to me. Even through all the education some people will never completely get how that hurts you. No matter what we here understand that you can't just always control your stress. Life doesn't work like that and especially with lupus the littlest things can make you flare and keeps you in a flare. Expect the unexpected when dealing with lupus. People who have never been chronically sick will always have their own ideas about illnesses, I did before I got lupus and so did my mom. It was a huge wake up call for her, so maybe it hasn't hit your dad yet.