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yxhewc
05-17-2006, 12:53 PM
OK... So here's another weird question from the master of not knowing anything (me)...

I was talking to my gf on the phone one night and after a while, she sorta fell asleep. I used "sorta" here because I don't think she's fully asleep... something like in alpha stage (in between sleep and being fully awake). I know this because once I hung up, she immediately called me back and asked me why I left her alone.

But that's besides the point. When she's half asleep, she moans a lot, like she's in a lot of pain, or like she's being tortured. Sometimes she would cry out (as if in pain) But the next morning when I call her (or she calls me), and I ask her if she was in pain during the night, she said no.

Question: Do lupus patients feel pain when they're asleep? I'm assuming that no painkillers were taken.

Another question: She can't seem to be able to retain her memory of her positive dreams, but retains heavy memory of her negative dreams. Normal?

Another question: Sometimes before she sleep she says her right leg feels numb-ish. Normal?

Maybe it's just me asking stupid questions... Hope you guys can help out! Solesinger and Susie have been great help

kelibeli
05-17-2006, 03:41 PM
yxhewc,
If your g/f is in pain during the day, there is a good chance it doesn't magically disappear when she goes to sleep. Have you ever pulled a muscle really bad? If you have, you know the pain can keep you awake because every time you move in your sleep it hurts. That's the kind of pain I have at night. I have deep muscle pain that feels like a combination of pulled muscles and charley-horses. It kind of sucks. So to answer your question: Yes, some lupus patients have pain in their sleep.

I don't know about the moaning. She may just be so exhausted. When I get really exhausted at night I tend to mumble my words and I'm not 100% there. You'd really have to ask her about that one.

Regarding dreams: I think it's pretty normal, even with perfectly healthy people, that nightmares are more memorable. They are scary and tend to wake up us right in the middle of it. Then it's hard to go back to sleep because you keep thinking about it, therefore the next morning you remember it well. I know a lot of people, without Lupus, that rarely remember any dreams at all and if they do it's because it was so scary it was hard to forget.

Leg Numbness: Pretty common. Numbness, tingling, burning, pins & needles, etc. These are all neurological issues.

You know what I think you need to do? Make sure your g/f is keeping a journal. She should write down all of her symptoms and everyday just jot down a bit about how she felt that day. It's hard to remember to do so I try to make sure I write in mine at least every couple of days. Just so I don't forget anything and I can find any patterns.

There is just one thing that I think you need to keep in mind. This is your g/f's illness. She is going to have it for the rest of her life. She needs to learn how to manage it and you just need to learn how to be supportive in the way she goes about it. You need to be supportive but also remember that it is her body. Lupus is so different for everybody that we can only really tell you about our own experiences. We can't give you specifics about your g/f. Keep asking questions because the more you learn the better, just don't expect miracle answers.

I know this is hard for you and that you just want to help her. My husband is bound and determined to find a cure. At the same time, he respects my need for space and if I don't want to talk about something he doesn't push me. He also knows that if he gets into a "looking for a cure" mode it will most likely stress me out and exacerbate my symptoms.

So support your girlfriend but don't add stress to her situation. Figure out how she needs to deal with this chronic illness and support that.
Also, make sure your read the spoon theory. It's the only thing I have found that even comes close to describing what it's like to have lupus.
-Kelli

SoleSinger
05-17-2006, 10:07 PM
I think that stuff can happen whether you have a chronic illness or not... I know even before I was sick I talked in my sleep... The moaning thing can DEFINITELY be due to pain.... And like kelli said, I think most people remember their more traumatic dreams than their good ones... The numbness... She gets it ALL the time before she goes to sleep? Does she ever get it any other time? I get my numbness and tingling at random times... It's never the same... Is it always the same leg? Just curious... Because again, mine can be in my hands one day then the next it will be my legs or one of my feet and one of my hands or whatever...

kelibeli
05-18-2006, 01:09 PM
Solesinger has a good point. The numbness/tingling etc varies with me as well. I have certain points on my body where it happens more often than others but it is random and varied. If she is always getting it in the same spot at the same time of night...I don't know, she should talk to her doc.

Sheryl
05-18-2006, 03:43 PM
Yeah, she probably should ask about the numbness. How long has it been going on? I had numbness in just one foot for a week, before my more significant symptoms set in. The doctors might know if it's anything serious.

Saysusie
05-22-2006, 09:29 AM
Kellibelli, Solesinger and Sheryl;
YOU GUYS ARE GREAT!!!!!


Saysusie

tbritt
06-07-2006, 05:46 PM
Hi-My loving husband informed me that I talk in my sleep. I tried to argue with him just for the fun of it, but a couple of weeks ago (after an especially stressful day) I was actually humming in my sleep. My husband was trying to record it. The next morning when he told me about it, I remembered dreaming that I was at work (the cause of my stress) and to keep from going postal I had started to hum-I hummed the song for him and he said, "That's it, that's the song!!" He said this lasted for over 10 minutes-I guess I took the 'count to 10' thing a little far, huh? :P

Saysusie
06-08-2006, 09:50 AM
Only as far as you needed it :lol: :lol:
I'd rather humm in my sleep than do the groaning and shouting that I've been accused of.
Maybe I'll try humming right before I fall asleep :lol:

Peace and Blessings
Saysusie