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Derek
11-20-2011, 06:24 AM
Hi Everyone, I have not been able to get on to the site here due to my daughter being seriously ill at the moment. To those people who have sent messages and friend requests, sorry that I have not been able to get back to you. She was in hospital for a couple of weeks, home for 2 days, then has been back in for about 2 weeks now, and I am very scared she won't be coming home this time. Her heart and lungs are very badly affected, she is very weak, shes on oxygen, wears diapers and swelling of the limbs and face. So heartbreaking to see a 16 yr old girl in this condition, she is only a skinny little thing, but she is a fighter and has always pulled through in the past, this time I am not so sure.

I just want to know has anyone who has a family member in this situation, have you ever said "Please God, just let her go, just let her go". That is how I feel at the moment, but I feel an extreme amount of guilt for even thinking that, I suppose its the guilt that I am having difficulty with.

Derek

debbie-b
11-20-2011, 07:13 AM
Hi Derek,

Fortunatly I have never had to say or think that about any of my children.
But I have had other family members, that were so hopelessly ill, that it would be a blessing if they would pass.
I wish you would not have to feel this way about your child.
Feeling guilty about it is very natural, because she is your child and you don't want her to suffer.
I wish you all the best and strength to deal with this difficult time.

Debbie

ritzbit
11-20-2011, 03:04 PM
I'm so sorry that your daughter and your family are going through all this. I don't know what to say other than I hope that things turn around and she gets well soon.

Gizmo
11-20-2011, 03:18 PM
Derek, my heart is breaking for you today. You should never feel guilty about wanting a loved one's suffering to end. I have a daughter with multiple health issues and I have thought about how I would deal with letting go if her suffering were to get too great. It's a horrible dilemma that no parent should have to face. My thoughts are for wisdom and strength for you and comfort for your daughter.

Nonna
11-20-2011, 06:57 PM
I have never faced you situation, but I've had friends who were severally injured or ill.
I pray and leave the decision to the Lord.

Hugs and prayer for your daughter, you and your family

magistramarla
11-20-2011, 07:42 PM
Derek,
My heart goes out to you. As a parent, I know that we would rather endure the pain for them than to see our children dealing with it.
I hope that she pulls through and gets better.
No matter what happens, please know that we will be here for you whenever you need to vent.
Gentle Hugs,
Marla

steve.b
11-20-2011, 10:24 PM
my heart goes out to you.
i have a friend who had 2 children, both with severe mental and physical issues.
they were normal happy children until they turned about 4.
the oldest (11) died not long ago.

everyone who knew her, cried for yer loss, but was thankfull that she no longer suffered.

we know the same is going to happen to her younger brother.

medicine cannot save everyone, but thankfully it can deminish the suffering.

you are not a bad person for wanting to see someones suffering come to an end.


please hug your fiance for me, and i would love to meet up when you return home.

kim,l
11-21-2011, 01:45 AM
i am so sorry you are going through this it is not wrong to want to see your child not in pain i wish you the best and hope your child gets better soon i wish i could hug you in person but i am sending you cyber hugs take care and my thoughts are with you at this difficult time.

Derek
11-22-2011, 06:18 AM
Thank you everyone for your thoughts and support, I am so glad that I found this site.

Take care.

Derek

Gizmo
11-22-2011, 07:47 AM
Thank you everyone for your thoughts and support, I am so glad that I found this site.

Take care.

Derek

How are things going, Derek?

Bonita
11-22-2011, 11:52 AM
As a parent this must be heart wrenching to watch her suffer. I f she is ready to go with the Lord and He is ready for her there is nothing else you can do. Please know that i will be praying for you all. Love Bonita

red246
11-22-2011, 09:08 PM
Derek,

I have never been in this situation w/my children, but was w/my sister. At the end, even though we all prayed for a miracle, we also prayed that if she wasn't to get well that God would just take her home and end her suffering. There is nothing wrong w/ wanting for them to not be in pain anymore. Please know that my prayers and thoughts are w/you and your family.

professor825
11-22-2011, 10:30 PM
Hi Derek,

I am sending prayers up for you and your family and wishing you all the best. I can imagine that this is an extremely difficult time, but I hope that you guys find comfort, peace, and strength. Also, I pray that your daughter gets better. I'm here if you ever need to talk or vent.

Carli

trustme
11-22-2011, 11:46 PM
aww im so sorry for your daughter. maan i don't have any children but if i did i would be having the same thoughts as you. nobody wants to see their family suffer. it really sounds like she is fighting for her life. if i were her i would do the same. she seems like she has a supportive father and family. if you ever need anything feel free to leave me a message in my inbox. also, i don't know if you noticed but you are stronger than you give yourself credit for to be able to be there for your daughter. i would hope my dad would be there for me too.

Derek
11-24-2011, 03:47 PM
Daughter is actually feeling a bit better today, swelling has gone down a bit in one leg, can actually see her knee cup, thats gotta be a positive thing.

kim,l
11-24-2011, 09:53 PM
derek i am glad your daughter is feeling a bit better hang in there hugs

steve.b
11-24-2011, 10:44 PM
Daughter is actually feeling a bit better today, ....

thinking of you and your family.

mdawncooper
11-25-2011, 07:36 AM
Dear Derek: I have not experienced my child being this sick but over the summer I watched my dad deteriorate like your daughter and yes I said, God please take him. I am praying for God to give you the strength that you need to get through these next few days. Please keep us posted.

Melanie

magistramarla
11-25-2011, 08:28 PM
Derek,
It was great to hear a bit of good news about your girl. Teens are pretty resilient.
Here's hoping that she will continue to improve,
Hang in there, Dad!
Hugs,
Marla

Gizmo
11-26-2011, 08:37 PM
Sometimes a little bit of good news feels like winning the lottery. I hope your daughter continues to head in the right direction, and please let us know how things are going for both of you. Take care of yourself, so you can continue to be there for her.