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ruziska
07-22-2011, 06:59 AM
Does anyone have a link to a good article or explanation of brain fog? Hubby just does NOT get it at all. He refuses to give me a break and try to understand brain fog. We've been going rounds about it. He won't accept it and says I'm using it as an excuse to not listen to him.

steve.b
07-22-2011, 07:27 AM
http://www.lupusny.org/about-lupus/fight-lupus-body-and-mind/thinking-memory-and-behavior


What is the most common kind of lupus brain involvement?
Many people with lupus—at least one in five—have trouble thinking clearly at some point and experiences memory problems, confusion, fatigue, or difficulty expressing thoughts. Called cognitive dysfunction, the condition likely occurs because blood stops flowing as smoothly to the brain as it should. This also can happen when lupus antibodies cross the "blood-brain barrier," directly damaging brain cells in areas that store memories and other important information. Cognitive dysfunction may come and go, but often steadily worsens over time.

What is "lupus fog?"
A part of cognitive dysfunction, some people with lupus get spells of "fogginess" when, for several seconds or minutes, they can not get to information that they know is in their heads. They may read the same sentence over and over again, for example. Or struggle with a normally easy task, like balancing a checkbook or dialing a familiar number.

What can be done about cognitive dysfunction and "lupus fogs?"
Reassurance from loved ones helps a lot. So can behavioral counseling, physical or speech therapy, biofeedback, techniques for relaxing the body and mind, and concentration strategies. A lupus diary can be useful to track when fogs happen and what works for dealing with them. Medicines may lessen the fatigue or depression that makes thinking hard. Doctors are learning a lot about how lupus antibodies hurt brain cells and are testing medicines for dementia that might some day help people with lupus.

Do other brain problems happen in people with lupus?
Blood flow to the brain feeds brain cells with nutrients (food) and oxygen. Strokes occur when this blood flow is interrupted and brain cells die from the lack of oxygen, causing symptoms such as tingling sensations and problems with vision, speech, and movement (including paralysis). People with lupus have a higher risk for stroke, especially the third or so who have "antiphospholipid antibodies" that make blood "sticky" and more likely to clot and stop or slow blood flow to the brain. Although uncommon, inflammation in the spinal cord or brain's blood vessels also happens with lupus and can lead to paralysis, seizures, difficulty judging reality, and loss of consciousness.

Can lupus change emotions and behavior?
Some people with lupus have mild but noticeable changes in behavior such as unusual feelings of fear or lack of fear, or loss of interest or curiosity. More commonly, the fatigue and pain of lupus is draining to the point that a person changes his or her outlook on life. Corticosteroids and other lupus medicines sometimes make matters worse by causing weepiness or other exaggerated feelings. The "emotional rollercoaster" of lupus is something that always should be discussed with a doctor.

rob
07-22-2011, 08:44 AM
Does anyone have a link to a good article or explanation of brain fog? Hubby just does NOT get it at all. He refuses to give me a break and try to understand brain fog. We've been going rounds about it. He won't accept it and says I'm using it as an excuse to not listen to him.


Hi Ruzika,

Along with Steve's links and info, you could also cite what has happened to me before as an example of what cognitive dysfunction can do to a person. Maybe he would understand an example better, or believe it coming from a guy.

I'm a 43 year old guy who knows the small town he grew up in like the back of his hand. I've driven into town to go to the grocery store hundreds of times over the years. Despite this, I have gone to the store and then become lost when I tried to drive home after getting my groceries. I don't mean a wrong turn, I mean drawing a total blank lost like I've never been here before. When this happens, I have to call either my family or girlfriend to come to my location so I can then follow them like a guide as they drive back to my house.

The first time this happened, the brain fog not only kept me from finding my way home, it also prevented me from calling anyone for help because I could not remember anyone's phone number. I now keep those numbers on a card in my wallet where I can easily find it so I can call for help (I have no cellphone with numbers stored because cells don't work well here, if at all). The fog usually comes with a flare, so I've learned to expect it. But sometimes it just strikes from out of the blue with no warning and when I'm not in a flare. It's scary when it happens.

I need no excuses for not listening to people, I need no excuses for anything really. Having to call your 75 year old father because you are lost in your own town is embarassing, and frankly humiliating even though my father understands brainfog, and would never try to make me feel stupid over it. I can't imagine what it would be like in this situation and not have anyone believe me or understand the reasons why this happens. Tell your husband this story, and then ask him to put himself in my place. What would he do? Wouldn't he want people to understand the reasons why he, a grown man, is lost in his own hometown like this?

I'm not trying to be mean or anything, so I hope this isn't taken that way. I just hope he can understand what you are dealing with, because I've been where you are. Feel free to use my story if you think it might help.

Rob

KCat
07-22-2011, 10:07 AM
More than anything I just want to say, you are in my thoughts, ruziska. I've been fortunate that while it confused my husband at first, he did get it fairly quickly. My coworkers did not. Of course, they had no idea I was sick and they kept telling me I needed to get more sleep, quit staying up late working on the home business, etc.

My experiences were not much different from Rob's. Worst times for me are actually in the stores. I would go into a grocery store with my husband and daughter and after a few minutes of UV exposure (all those dang fluorescent lights) would stand at the end of an aisle completely befuddled. I could picture in my mind the things I needed to buy. I could not name them or tell you what they were or where they were located in the store. My husband took over grocery shopping not long after that. It scared him too much to see me in that condition. I would get angry and start snapping at them because they'd be saying "What? What's next?" I could look at the list and read it to myself but voicing it was impossible. At work I'd be asked where something was and have to point and say things like "that big brown box that keeps things warm" (cell incubator) or "the room with the swirly thing" (the room where the centrifuge is). I'd walk down the hall with a question for my boss, get to her door and just stand there. Lost. They thought I was an idiot all of a sudden. So much so that when one of the PhDs lost a $500 protein, they blamed me. Later they half apologized and I quit the following Monday. Wasn't worth it anymore to put my body through that Hell. The lab had all uncovered fluorescent lights and the lab I spent most of my time in had UV bulbs that ran half the time to kill infectious agents. So not only was I sick but my job was making me sicker.

I've only gotten lost once but that was enough to scare the heck out of me.

I still fog up in the stores if I'm there too long. I cover up a lot to try to reduce it but it only helps so much. We limit our errand running on weekends so I don't get too wiped out. I'm a high GPA student, have an above-average IQ, but when I'm fogged I might as well be 2 years old and learning to speak all over again.

rob
07-22-2011, 10:49 AM
I know what you mean KCat,

I do the whole point and talk thing too. If I'm in a car and I have a foggy mind, and I try to say something like "glovebox", I can't say the word, so I just point and say "that thing right there". Or if I want to say "carwash", I end up saying something like "that place with the spray guns where you clean your vehicle".

I too was a high GPA student, was in accelerated programs where I got a nice head start on life, but when the fog hits, I may as well be a child. I used to do a lot of flying, and I joke with people by telling them I had to quit because I was worried I'd get up there and forget how to land. Truth is, I could easily forget how to do any number of things like putting the landing gear down before landing, or properly setting the flaps for landing. Omissions that could get you killed. At least in a car, I can pull over, stop, and ask for help.

Ain't Lupus wonderful...

Rob

KCat
07-22-2011, 10:54 AM
I know what you mean KCat,

Ain't Lupus wonderful...

Rob

It's a freakin' party, Rob. Where's my pointy hat and that little whistle thing that unrolls when you blow on it? What's that called?

sigh...

debbie-b
07-22-2011, 11:09 AM
I have not gotten lost yet, thank God, because that sounds very scary.
But I do get these fogs, where I can't think of the proper word, instead of countertop I said, the table with the coffeepot on it, or, instead of prescription, I say, the paper the doctor gives you to get pills, ( I said that on the phone with the doctors office, when I called for a refill). Today I am going to make enchiladas, but forgot to get tortillas, so I called my hubby to please pick some up on his way home, but I couldn't remember the word tortillas, so I said to him ," the white flat bread that they use in Mexico." lol
My husband is awesome though, he understands me and finishes my sentences.

Debbie

magistramarla
07-22-2011, 03:16 PM
Rita,
If testimonials are any help in convincing him - here's mine.
Like Rob, I was one of those gifted kids. I graduated second in my class at the age of 16 and went to college on a full scholarship. Graduated with a 3.82 GPA, member of Phi Beta Kappa at the age of 20, with my one year old daughter crossing the stage by my side.
I recently taught Latin in a huge high school. I know Latin very well. I started forgetting vocabulary words that I had just taught the kids. They thought that I was doing it on purpose when I would pause, so they would shout out the vocab. word. I rolled with it, and the kids got very good at finishing my sentences for me.
My hubby is also good at finishing sentences for me. As Rob described it very well, a very common word for something can just escape me. I can describe the thing, and Jeff will usually guess it, but it is a very frustrating game of charades for me.
Hope this helps.
Hugs,
Marla

Corella
07-23-2011, 02:53 AM
I can relate to what Rob has described, I forget how to use the photocopier or like yesterday, the phone - it was as though someone had removed the buttons I wanted, swapped them around and put them back when I wasnt looking.

Can they treat brainfog? Mine was a lot better when I was on steroids for some reason. But I get dreadful headaches and I have heard they are related.

What I find seriously upsetting is how those with Lupus often have problems with their partners, and if I am diagnosed, I am terrified this will happen to me, that he will get fed up with me being sick. I realise it is hard for them, honestly I do but I will be straight with you, is the 'for better or for worse' or the 'in sickness and in health' part of the wedding vows a selective thing, as in 'in sickness and in health but not in lupus' because it certainly seems that way.

I would love my husband no matter what illness he had, and I hope he would do the same for me and when I read about stuff like this it upsets me, lupus may change and affect many things about a person but they are still the same person you fell in love with and yes it is hard for the partners but no matter how hard it is, it does not give them the right to treat their loved ones like this.

Peridot20_Gem
07-23-2011, 04:05 AM
Hello Rita,

All i can say mate is i hope he reads steve's link and also what Robs put and if he's still no better mate.

"Stick a gun to his head" lol...because it's terrible trying to get some people to understand illnesses never mind issues and being your hubby he should know better because you've got that much on your plate it's unbelieveable.

((Hugs Terry)) xxx

dawn patrol
07-23-2011, 04:48 AM
I used to play music professionally. I've noticed in the last couple of years, however, that I've been forgetting lyrics to songs that I've played zillions of times, solos mid-riff, and o m g.. occasionally I'll feel confused all of a sudden and say wth was I just playing? It is embarrassing and makes me feel incompetent. I'm glad to know I'm not lost in the fog alone.

lovedbyHim
07-23-2011, 05:31 AM
I used to play music professionally. I've noticed in the last couple of years, however, that I've been forgetting lyrics to songs that I've played zillions of times, solos mid-riff, and o m g.. occasionally I'll feel confused all of a sudden and say wth was I just playing? It is embarrassing and makes me feel incompetent. I'm glad to know I'm not lost in the fog alone.

Dawn I used to sing frequently at Bluegrass jams & now I have to read the words as I forge so very much. I can say I truly know what you miss.

Linda From Australia
07-23-2011, 06:38 AM
We went to my daughter’s house for dinner tonight, and we were watching one of those make over shows. They took out the “thingy" and I was discussing how they never put the thing back that you hang out the clothes on - all eyes were on me, but I managed to remember what it was called eventually and said the clothes line. You could see everyone just relaxing a bit. This is happening more and more to me, but it was so much more obvious tonight. I pride myself in for hardly ever making mistakes, but to my husband’s delight, he has been counting how many times I make mistakes, it has become a sort of game for my whole family.

It is a pity your family doesn’t make fun of you and your failings, it is so much more easier to live with than the nasty comments that your husband is making.

I am really annoyed at myself because my new specialist was telling me something about cognitive disfunction, and my brain went on pause, and by the time I pressed the play button again, I accidentally pressed fast forward and missed the whole conversation. I think I might buy a dictaphone and hide it in my hand bag next time I have an appointment. But my luck, I will forget to press record, or worse still I will press play and some stupid embarrassing conversation will be played and I would forget how to turn it off - how horrid that will be.

Sorry Rita (I think is your name) I have nothing worth while to suggest, except to offer you my support.

rob
07-23-2011, 12:32 PM
I used to play music professionally. I've noticed in the last couple of years, however, that I've been forgetting lyrics to songs that I've played zillions of times, solos mid-riff, and o m g.. occasionally I'll feel confused all of a sudden and say wth was I just playing? It is embarrassing and makes me feel incompetent. I'm glad to know I'm not lost in the fog alone.

I used to play piano, easily, like it just flowed, more often than not without any sheet music, and I could nail each song everytime. Now, the connections between my ears, my brain, and my fingers are so gummed up and slow, that I can barely play. I started playing when I was little, maybe 5 or 6 I think. Now that's more or less gone.

I wish I'd never heard the word "autoimmune".

lovedbyHim
07-23-2011, 01:29 PM
Ok yesterday was my daughter's birthday and I totally forgot about it until an hour ago. This is not funny & it breaks my heart. I never miss birthdays!

Linda From Australia
07-23-2011, 01:31 PM
Is there any way that you can organise a surprise something for you, so she would never know that you forgot.

tgal
07-23-2011, 01:32 PM
I am going to try to post to this thread because it hits so close to home but Please ignore any errors because my shaky hands don't do well chatting from my Phone. I am currently away from home and my computer, and will be for several days, but I coulnt let this thread go.

I was a very smart, educated wOman who spent her days working with attorneys and was considered the best in my company working problem files. On top of that I had spent a couple of years working and holding several certifications and working with a company installing and supporting computers and networks. I couldearn anything quickly and seldom forgot anything if I wrote it down.

Several years ago my memory started to go. It was very irritating and frustrating but I thought I was getting old. There are many thingsbi could tell here but I have to get back to wHat I am doing so I will jump ahead to now. I no longer drive. Not only because of the seizures but because I have no short term memory and I get lost in a town and area I have lived in 30 of the 40 plus years I have been alive. My family says that talking to me is like playing charades. I know what word I want to say but I can't 'find' it. We keep a white board in the kitchen area to write down important things I need to do because I have no short term memory left. I cod go on and on but I don't have time and I am sure you are bored

Yes.... It is real and it is actully the part of this diseSe that hurt me and causes me the worst pain since my illness. Others think that it irritates them ... Try living it and knowing that you are half the person you were before

lovedbyHim
07-23-2011, 01:49 PM
Is there any way that you can organise a surprise something for you, so she would never know that you forgot.

It's too late I already apologized. Ugh! She knows I've been very sick & she has had morning sickness and an ER visit. Stress has been too high here. I will buy her a beautiful maternity top to make up for it. Sheesh!

KCat
07-23-2011, 11:27 PM
Yes.... It is real and it is actully the part of this diseSe that hurt me and causes me the worst pain since my illness. Others think that it irritates them ... Try living it and knowing that you are half the person you were before

Maybe it's just me but I think this is a symptom that we really need to vent about and often don't. We know we can vent about pain but The Fog seems kind of petty to gripe about. It isn't painful, it's just frustrating. So we tell ourselves. But it strikes at the core of our self-esteem. It used to just kill me to see the look on my boss's face. "What happened? You dropped 50 IQ points since I hired you." seemed to be going through her mind.

You're still the same person. Your mind is no less than it was. Clearly, despite the memory issues, you're no less intelligent or capable. There's a wonderful essay by a gentleman who suffered a brain injury - I'll have to look it up - that caused him to lose his short-term memory in a severe way. Things that happen 2 minutes ago, gone. But he still writes. It takes huge effort. Hours just to write a single paragraph by constant repetition of each sentence and trying to keep connected to each thought. It's hellish for him but critical to his sanity in that he knows that his intellect is intact, while his memory is not. For him, he must keep in touch with the former. It's both shocking and inspiring to read. For me, it was eye opening.

When I went back to school I doubted myself. I thought there was no way I could compete with the younger students either creatively or analytically. Too old and too foggy. And some days, that is true. I just have to shut down the PC and nap while they chatter away. But most of the time I can keep up and sometimes, even push past them. I surprised myself.

You still are a smart, educated woman. I can tell that in the limited interaction I've had already. You just have this barrier in communication between the information and expressing it. Play with your brain. Moderating is one way of doing that already. I know that from moderating on an unrelated forum. It can be a challenge in itself. Especially on a collecting board. Some really entertaining people in the collecting world.

Take care,
KCat - always up for a game of charades.

Linda From Australia
07-23-2011, 11:55 PM
There's a wonderful essay by a gentleman who suffered a brain injury - I'll have to look it up - that caused him to lose his short-term memory in a severe way. Things that happen 2 minutes ago, gone. But he still writes. It takes huge effort. Hours just to write a single paragraph by constant repetition of each sentence and trying to keep connected to each thought. It's hellish for him but critical to his sanity in that he knows that his intellect is intact, while his memory is not. For him, he must keep in touch with the former. It's both shocking and inspiring to read. For me, it was eye opening.

I would be really interested in reading about his inspirational person. PLEASE PLEASE try to find his essay.

Peridot20_Gem
07-24-2011, 03:17 AM
I find just keeping the home in order a pressure with brain fog...i go to do something and end up doing another and trying to communicate with my husband the words come out wrong.

lovedbyHim
07-24-2011, 05:28 AM
Does anyone have a link to a good article or explanation of brain fog? Hubby just does NOT get it at all. He refuses to give me a break and try to understand brain fog. We've been going rounds about it. He won't accept it and says I'm using it as an excuse to not listen to him.

I guess hearing all the insensitive things the husbands are doing I have sarcasm coming out of my brain. If all these idea don't work how about this reply, " You're right I use it as an excuse because everthin that comes out of your mouth is STUPID!" IS THIS A BIT HARSH?

sonmak
07-24-2011, 07:01 AM
It's embarrassing how many times I find myself saying.... you know, I used to be a Writer & Editor! Trying to explain that I wasn't as dumb as I appeared. Words were my gift, the ability to spin a sentence or choose a word that fit perfectly. I would use up a pen almost every month. In my family I was always considered the 'smart one' (if a little odd ; > ) sooo much 'potential'. I took the nation wide iq test (on the telly) and averaged in the top 15% in the country (obviously, out of those who participated)... and I was 'self medicated' while taking it. Now... It's like I provide the entertainment, its like a game of charades when I'm trying to explain something. It's like sometimes my family have stopped listening to what I'm saying and are listening to how I say it, and my point is constantly lost. Simple concepts and recounts are so hard to express at times. My memory is ridiculous at times, it scares me when I lose all recall about something, when my family shake their head and say, 'how could you possibly not remember that?!' They laugh and say that's cute, but it scares me because no matter how I rack my brain, I can't remember at all!! not even a little! how can that happen.... and what else have I forgotten???
Recently, my brand new Rhuemy asked me if I had any symptoms other than pain and swelling, I just looked at her, I didn't know where to begin or how to say what I needed. I ended up just staring at her blankly while my head whirled. She sent a letter to my gp saying I had complained of no symptoms other than pain and swelling. Grrr, I've just set my disability claim back weeks, while I survive on whatever I can scrounge from an overworked, underfunded, resentful, healthy and fit husband.
This post has taken me nearly an hour and countless rereads to write. : ( And people tell me I just need to adopt a more beneficial attitude, that I am happy to embrace the 'laid back' lifestyle my body gives me the excuse for. Bull$#@! I was smart, I could express things and move people with words, I was earning a name for myself in the publishing industry, I had a GIFT ffs! I never chose to give anything up, this isn't what I'd planned.
I don't know what advice I can give that would be helpful, Perhaps just another example will help. I feel like all I do is complain when I'm trying to be helpful and its not very positive so I have not to post so much, but I wanted to try. (Also, to be honest, I think I also wanted to shout out.... Hey, I was smart once!)

sonmak
07-24-2011, 07:16 AM
Ok yesterday was my daughter's birthday and I totally forgot about it until an hour ago. This is not funny & it breaks my heart. I never miss birthdays!

Last month I was so proud of myself for remembering that it was my Mums birthday (after forgetting my nephews and step-mothers), got her a little something and rang her to say happy birthday and we'd pop in that arvo to see her... only, she was really upset, it wasn't just any birthday, it was her 60th! Nothing was planned, I knew this a few months before because I had apparently had a conversation with hubbie about organising something special (like I had for my Dad a couple of yrs ago). But then I forgot, and I didn't remember, at all, for months. Even while picking up her pressie. I felt so horrible. I'm sorry you forgot, its not ur fault. Remember, children who are loved are genuinely forgiving.

lovedbyHim
07-24-2011, 07:43 AM
Last month I was so proud of myself for remembering that it was my Mums birthday (after forgetting my nephews and step-mothers), got her a little something and rang her to say happy birthday and we'd pop in that arvo to see her... only, she was really upset, it wasn't just any birthday, it was her 60th! Nothing was planned, I knew this a few months before because I had apparently had a conversation with hubbie about organising something special (like I had for my Dad a couple of yrs ago). But then I forgot, and I didn't remember, at all, for months. Even while picking up her pressie. I felt so horrible. I'm sorry you forgot, its not ur fault. Remember, children who are loved are genuinely forgiving.


THANK YOU SO MUCH. YOUR WORDS BLESS ME. My daughter and I talked and she said, "I have a great idea! Let wait until my belly gets bigger and we can go out to eat and ship for maternity clothes!" She forgives me and looks forward to our outing. My kids do understand. THANK GOD.

sharpiessave
07-24-2011, 08:42 AM
Yesterday we had Thanksgiving in July. It was an 'in your face' kind of thing to the dumb heat. I got a text from my brother wishing us a happy one, and instructing me to eat a big ole turkey leg for him. But when I read the text out loud to Mama, it came out "Eat a big ole turtle leg for me!"

I, too, am become a source of constant amusement for my family and friends. And oh, how they love it. They love it so much that I have to join in on the fun too. For us, it's become one of the fun things that has come out of The Mess. Like being ok with being fat, it was a challenge at first. I'd get my back up for a month or so whenever something completely ridiculous came out of my mouth. This was my ego showing, cuz like so many of you, I used to be a wizkid, and I got used to feeling verbally superior to those around me. A couple months ago, though, I said something ridiculous that of course I can't remember now. There was a long silence in the room, and then my 4yo goddaughter giggled so hard koolade shot out of her mouth. Everybody else, including me, joined in, and from there on out it's stopped being a frustration and has become fun. It's like the mayor of NYC telling SNL they are allowed to be funny again. So far, it's the only alright thing to come out of The Mess, so I'll take it.

Peridot20_Gem
07-24-2011, 03:31 PM
Sharpie,

Now i think that's brill how your family except how you are and although your ill, you can have a good laugh with them when your messing up with your brain but still get brightened up with a good old laugh mate.

I think it's lovely for you mate. ((Hugs Terry)) xxx

rob
07-24-2011, 05:57 PM
I, too, am become a source of constant amusement for my family and friends. And oh, how they love it. They love it so much that I have to join in on the fun too. For us, it's become one of the fun things that has come out of The Mess.

My family and I have fun with it too sometimes. My nephew, who knows about my brainfog, works at a local grocery store. I'm there grocery shopping one day, and he stops to say hello how ya' doin. We talk for a bit, then my thoughts go back to getting my groceries. At the end of the conversation, I ask in what aisle could I find something on my shopping list, but I can't remember the item, and the list is at home on the kitchen counter. I'm looking down, trying to think, and the conversation goes like this-

Me-Hey, in what ailse could I find, um, where can I find, um...

Nephew-Where can you find the glow in the dark condoms?

Me-NO, no, where I can find the...

Nephew-Tampons?

Me- Dammit No! Where can I find the, um...

Nephew-The latest issue of Cosmopolitan Magazine?

Me, DAMMIT NO!

I then see he's trying to keep a serious face, but not doing it very well. At this point, we both break out laughing our butts off. I laughed so hard that it hurt.

Sometimes the effects of our brainfog on others interactions with us can be funny as hell.

Rob

lovedbyHim
07-24-2011, 07:31 PM
My family and I have fun with it too sometimes. My nephew, who knows about my brainfog, works at a local grocery store. I'm there grocery shopping one day, and he stops to say hello how ya' doin. We talk for a bit, then my thoughts go back to getting my groceries. At the end of the conversation, I ask in what aisle could I find something on my shopping list, but I can't remember the item, and the list is at home on the kitchen counter. I'm looking down, trying to think, and the conversation goes like this-

Me-Hey, in what ailse could I find, um, where can I find, um...

Nephew-Where can you find the glow in the dark condoms?

Me-NO, no, where I can find the...

Nephew-Tampons?

Me- Dammit No! Where can I find the, um...

Nephew-The latest issue of Cosmopolitan Magazine?

Me, DAMMIT NO!

I then see he's trying to keep a serious face, but not doing it very well. At this point, we both break out laughing our butts off. I laughed so hard that it hurt.

Sometimes the effects of our brainfog on others interactions with us can be funny as hell.

Rob

I see your nephew has your sense of humor. I am laughing hard here. Do they really make glow in the dark ones? That can't be healthy.

KCat
07-25-2011, 08:38 AM
Linda,

His name is Floyd Skloot. The essay I read is "A Measure of Acceptance" and is in a book of wonderful non-fiction essays called The Touchstone Anthology of Contemporary Creative Nonfiction. I'm sure it is on one of his books of essays but I can't determine which one at this time. Some of his books on Amazon have Table of Contents listings, some do not.

However, there is a longer piece, a book dealing with the subject in more detail:
http://www.floydskloot.com/

See "In the Shadow of Memory" under Books.